Luka announces that they have sixty patients in triage, and Carter assigns Pratt to run the board, I guess because no one can clear a room quite like a self-obsessed nutrag. Who is Chief Resident, by the way? Just wondering. Pratt rubs his hands together and more or less announces that the Court of Asshattery is now in session, with the Honorable Judge Dink presiding. He informs them all that the easy days are over, and that they're expected today to discharge twenty-five patients per shift. Neela and Abby are floored. "Just two an hour," points out Ray sunnily. Pratt doles out a few cases. "We're the only ones left; guess that makes us a team," says a voice behind Neela. She whirls to see Sara "Darlene Connor" Gilbert staring at her. She's a fourth-year med student. Roseanne would be so proud, when she wasn't busy braying or eating babies, or whatever it is she does. "That was quite a flash entrance you made," Darlene says. Neela looks flattered. "With all the rumors going around about how you freaked out, it was great how you came in and set everyone straight," Darlene continues. Neela's expression changes from joyous to queasy, and she excuses herself before she ties her stethoscope in a neat bow around Darlene's neck. Where did that Penny girl go? None of these med students, save Urbanus, are the same. I guess they're finally sending people around on rotations, or something. Hmm. Accuracy. I'm not quite sure how to cope with this phenomenon.
Neela ditches Darlene to have Pratt sign something, using that opportunity to ask him not to go easy on her. As if. Pratt's never gone easy on anyone except a woman he's trying to get in the sack. Malarkey passes through the scene, handing off a pelvic exam he has yet to perform. Wait, is Malarkey ill? You're telling me he had the chance to stare up the business end of a woman's sex pie and he refused it? Someone take his temperature.
Darlene trots up and asks Neela why she got kicked out of Michigan. Except that she just referenced Neela's having a meltdown, so she knows that wasn't the case. Sigh. Ray cuts through the scene with a box of chocolates, and we pick up his trail. He's using them to woo nurses into doing what he needs. What annoys me is that they all go for it, despite weak objections -- especially Chuny, who frets about her diet and then allows Ray to ooze, "You can eat whatever you want" -- and so that Ray gets to strut around like the cock that he is. "Lesson #1: Feed the nurses," he says arrogantly to his med-student posse. Thank you for reducing women to sugar freaks. ["Women, and Malik and Yosh." -- Wing Chun]