Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magic

Episode Report Card
Heathen: C+ | Grade It Now!
Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magic

Abby stares into a fish net and wonders whether they can resuscitate a fish. Carter doubts this. "Think we should flush him?" Abby asks playfully. "Think Luka will miss him?" Carter snorts. "Maybe he'll think one of the other fish ate him," Abby grins, shoving the net toward Carter. He flirtatiously bats it away, but clearly wants her to snare him with it. She makes him take it, and he then dumps the supposedly expired fish back into the tank. It sinks. Not so dead. As she wipes down the tank's glass, Abby babbles that she was bad with creatures and used to paint her pet turtle with nail polish, but Carter is anxious to leave and isn't listening. They're cute together, but the madcap-adventure plot feels really forced. Carter is anxious to leave. "I just have to wipe the place down for prints," Abby sasses. Hunched over, ready to pick up the new fish tank, Abby freezes when she hears the door buzzer. Peeved, Carter hangs his head while Abby sneaks over to check the peephole; she sees two impatient-looking cops staring back at her.

Benton and Mark prepare to administer an ultrasound, just as their patient begins to regain consciousness. Her name is Anna, her stomach hurts, and she cagily denies having a baby. Mark gives her a "holy shit" look, but is interrupted by news that her spleen is damaged from internal bleeding and must be removed. "You haven't delivered your placenta yet," he adds. Anna's eyes fly open. "No, I'm not pregnant!" she insists, flickering her gaze back and forth between her two physicians. "You were," Mark confirms. "Did you leave your baby at the church?" Anna staunchly denies all knowledge of a baby, so Mark does the intelligent thing and orders Peter to hold off on the life-saving operation long enough that he can wave a baby in front of her face.

Bolting next door and feigning brief interest in The Baby That Brought Chen and Chuny Together, Mark grabs the bed and wheels it through into Anna's trauma room. Chen and Chuny help, but protest that the child still badly needs transfusions. Mark is hell-bent on making his point. Mark, shut up, freak! If you know it's her baby and you know Anna needs surgery, why not reunite them in recovery? No, no, Baldy has to make a point and brandish a sick baby. Go AWAY, Mark. "Dr. Greene, her pressure's borderline," Benton argues. "I've got to take her up!" Likewise, Chen protests that she needs to hook the monitors back up to this ill baby. Still, Mark insists on putting two patients at risk, because he's first in the credits and that's how it works. He introduces Anna to her baby, and over the young girl's protests, describes how she birthed it, tied off the umbilical cord with a shoelace, and deposited her in a church so that someone might save her. "I can't have a baby," she sputters. "But you did," Mark insists. We get plenty of shots of the infant, who is especially adorable right now, gurgling and smiling and bringing nobody together. I hate, hate, hate the previews for this show. Sniffling, tears mingling with the blood stains on her face, Anna swears she never meant to hurt the baby, and figured God could protect the newborn. "He did," Chen says softly. "Some people think she's a miracle." Anna's eyes fly open. Chen confirms, "They feel better when they're near her." Gentle piano music of The Baby That Brought Itself and Its Mother Together tinkles in the background as Anna, awed, reaches for the baby's hand and clasps it, smiling broadly. Chen smiles, too, but with a tinge of wariness, since both patients are due for fairly important medical treatments despite Mark's best efforts to thwart them.

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