ER
Homecoming

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Wing Chun: D | Grade It Now!
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Homecoming

In a trauma room, Mark asks whether Mike's chest hurts. Mike says that it does, a little: "The safety speared me with his helmet on the way down." Haleh says that Mike's "tachy at 120," Mark announces that there are good breath sounds bilaterally, and Mike continues giving us the play-by-play: "That's illegal. Second play of the game. They were looking to take me out." Uh, Mike? The set of Remember the Titans is thattaway. Blah blah, they were our rivals, blah, homecoming, blah.

Dr. Dave leads the med-student tour into a trauma, where Luka is rather languidly calling out orders to Malik. Dr. Dave is all swagger, "Does she have a pulse?" The camera shows the patient on the table; it's a white-haired and very white-skinned woman on whom Luka is doing compressions. "Oh. She's dead," Dr. Dave observes astutely. "I know," says Luka. "Like, blue dead," adds Dr. Dave. The med students totally don't break their wrists getting down this bit of precise medical jargon for future reference. Malik says, "Pulse ox 65," and Dr. Dave repeats, "That's because she's dead." Luka patiently explains, "Her husband drove her in," and flicks his head toward the glass doors, where, I swear to God, B.B. Andersen from Survivor is watching with a worried expression. Weaver pushes through the doors beside B.B., keeping her head down. Dr. Dave says, "Oh. Right." Lisa chirps, "Still asystole." Dr. Dave asks if, since they're faking it anyway, one of the med students may use Mrs. B.B. to practice CPR. Weaver briefly shakes her head, and Luka says, "No." Everyone keeps looking at B.B. instead of at Mrs. B.B., like that's not totally suspicious. Luka tells Dr. Dave to go tell B.B. that his wife is very sick. Dr. Dave observes, "She...can't get any sicker." Okay, heh. Luka makes this really funny get-the-fuck-out-of-my-face-doofus face (but with a Croatian accent), and Weaver tells Dr. Dave to give B.B. some time to prepare himself. In the hall, Dr. Dave tries to look more sincere than amphibian. Weaver tells Lisa that the registrar didn't put Lisa's name on her roster, and asks whether she's sure she's registered. Okay, my dad is a university registrar. Shout-out? Weaver figures that the registrar's offer must just be backed up because of the strike. B.B. and Luka exchange looks. Luka has a bad poker face. But a good face in every other respect.

Carter checks out of the clinic. "Checking out?" asks Nurse Bitchy. Well. Yes. Sitting on that same bench Carter did three months (or twelve minutes, depending on your perspective) ago is a doctor with an aquiline nose and slightly curly hair who bears a striking enough resemblance to Rick Rossovich that everyone in the Game Room asked, as if in one voice, "Is that Tag?" By which, of course, we meant Dr. Taglieri, Carol's ultimately jilted fiancé from the first season. He never speaks and we never get a good enough look at his face to tell whether it's him or not. I like to think it is, and that the ER writers are trying to show that it is still possible for them to be subtle sometimes. Nurse Bitchy hands Carter a piece of paper and says that Benton called to confirm Carter's flight, and said that he'd pick Carter up at the gate. Tag and Carter exchange a look, but it isn't clear whether they recognize each other. Carter signs himself out and says goodbye to Nurse Bitchy. He'll be back. Or will he? Should we start a pool on that, too? ["I'm in for five bags of Combos: he goes back on the junk but doesn't go back to rehab." -- Sars]

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