Previously on ER, some guy died, and Weaver told Carter to fill his void. Carter immediately went to Lens Crafters and then married his sister. Gallant and Pratt messed up when the latter insisted upon giving a thoracotomy despite lacking the authority to do so. Carter urged Pratt to toe the line. Later, Carter tried to drag Abby to an AA meeting, and he failed, but she did cup his face, so that's a bonus.
The phone rings in the ER. Susan stares at the board and wonders why a dog-bite victim is still here; Pratt says it's because he hasn't gotten his IV yet. This leads up to the reveal that the ER is short on nurses because half of them are in a training class. Susan hints that Pratt should get off his bum and do the IV, but he declines, saying he did his fair share of that stuff while interning at the VA. I wish very fervently that he'd shut up about the VA. Pratt puts the "Oh dear God PLEASE stop talking" into "annoying." Susan smirks at him and fake-lectures, "There's no 'I' in 'team,' Pratt." He glares. "People really say crap like that here?" he metas. Jerry interrupts to say that Weaver's on the phone with "a mouthful of marbles." Susan exposits that Weaver chipped her tooth in Barbados, so apparently, Mark's death did, in fact, spur her to take time off and put on a bikini. But we didn't get to see it, because we were too busy ogling a shirtless Mark. Where's the justice, Wells? Where is it? Is it on The Court? Wait, no, I forgot -- nothing is on The Court anymore. Abby, upon learning of Weaver's dental woes, snickers, "I told her to stop opening beer bottles with her teeth." She then turns to Pratt and asks him to toddle off into Exam Three. Carter drifts past. "Why Pratt?" he wonders. "I don't know," deadpans Abby. "He's got a cute ass?" Pratt considers this, and while the scene continues, he sneaks a peek at Abby's ass and appears to deem it acceptable, although one flavor short of bootylicious. Abby tells Carter that she's down three nurses, which prompts Gallant to offer some help. "The point is, why should we [help]?" sneers Pratt. Carter promptly shoots him, and they throw a luau. He then benevolently announces that they should all pitch in and help during this tragic shortfall. "All this because a nurse tells us to," Pratt condescends. Carter leans against the desk and simpers, "No, because Abby is the Obi-Wan Kenobi of nurses." And Carter has just the light sabre in mind to whip out at her. "So what's that make you? Yoda?" Pratt groans. "Learn from her you will," Carter nods. And go see Star Wars: Epsiode II - Attack of the Clones, which conveniently premiered right as this line was broadcast! Congratulations, George! Don't forget to sign my yearbook!