...to the lounge, where Elizabeth "Bride of Dorkenstein" Corday and Mark "Indecent Proposal" Greene are arguing.
Mark: Why not Christmas?
Elizabeth: Next Christmas.
Mark: No, this Christmas.
Elizabeth: Are you mad? It takes months to plan a wedding.
Wing Chun: Girl, you're marrying Mark. It doesn't take that long to find an appropriately dark, forbidding, and secluded location to admit to the world that you're willing to settle for him. I suggest Bald Mountain. (tm Sars)
Carter enters unnoticed behind them and makes for his locker, whereupon Mark greets him; before Carter can answer, Mark and Elizabeth simultaneously announce their news: he says, "We bought a house," and she says, "We got engaged." Aw. Oh, sorry -- I just saw a silverfish crawling across my desk, and it was more appealing to me than the idea of these two commingling DNA and bringing a curly-haired penis-head into the world. And, ew, Elizabeth even does that thing where she crooks her hand and uses her thumb to push her ring finger further forward than one's ring finger traditionally extends, in order to show off her ring. When did she become such a girl? I hope that thing falls into someone's chest cavity and that she stitches it in there. Carter congratulates them on both counts, fidgeting with his lock, and continues, "Boy, I go away for a couple of weeks, you guys get engaged, Chen's pregnant, Malucci's blond, Admin looks totally different, and I can't seem to remember my locker combination." Mark says, as if he's just remembering, that the State Medical Board made them clean the locker out when Carter left. Carter somewhat testily asks where his stuff is, and Mark dodges the question by saying that he'll look into getting Carter another locker, and that Carter can share Mark's locker until then. Mark climbs up on the bench to drag down a box perched atop the bank of lockers. As he rifles through it, Elizabeth exposits that there's a surgical conference going on, so the department is short-staffed and the residents shouldn't call for any unnecessary consults. Gee, I wonder whether something will happen that requires a whole mess of surgeons, and that there won't be any around! That would be stressful and dramatic! And totally unprecedented! Not. I didn't even have to get up on my roof to see the steam ship carrying the inevitable no-surgeons catastrophe coming across Lake Ontario, with Captain Merrill Foreshadowing saluting me smartly from the bow. Anyway, Elizabeth wishes Carter luck and...ugh...kisses Mark and may have done something else but I was rolling my eyes and couldn't see the screen. I think I heard something about their "talk[ing] dates later," though. Mark hands Carter a lab coat and dorkily asks whether Carter is "ready to rock and roll." Mark tells Carter that if Carter needs to talk about anything he should come talk to Mark. Because Mark has such a sterling record when it comes to dealing with stress. I mean, he didn't manifest symptoms of untreated Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder for a whole season, or anything. Oh, wait. He did. Mark leaves to scratch his nads in private, and Carter reaches into the box and takes out a stethoscope.