ER
Quo Vadis?

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Quo Vadis?

The cop leads Mark outside and points to Rachel, who is sitting in the paddy wagon and trying to hide her trident and horns. She isn't under arrest; the cop just likes to mess with young minds before delivering them home to their angry parents. Mark wants her released to his custody immediately.

As Weaver exits and bids farewell to an elderly patient, Sandy appears and timidly asks if she can get her hand examined after all. She jammed it rolling some hose. That's going to be a fabulous euphemism for a future recap. Weaver glows and ushers Sandy inside, eager to have an ER-sanctioned excuse for some hand-holding and footsie.

At Divorce Court, Benton takes the stand. It's revealed that his shifts often extend for twelve hours, and he frequently works nights and weekends. Casually, with that annoying air of familiarity and friendliness assumed by twerp attorneys, Eyebrows asks Peter to describe what typically happens when a gunshot victim arrives in the ER. Peter answers that he evaluates that patient and sends him or her to the OR when necessary. Eyebrows wants to know how long it takes to operate on person who's been shot in the chest, so that he can shoot someone, send them to Benton, and win the case by tying up the defendant in surgery. Benton explains that it all depends on the path of the bullet, the amount of vascular damage, and a mess of other factors; I think he's showing off and deliberately not answering the question directly. Eyebrows asks if this could take an hour; Benton guesses three, but when pressed, admits that in rare cases it can take five hours to operate on a case like this. Naturally, this is when Eyebrows calls into question the suitability and stability of Reese's substitute caretakers -- the people watching Reese while Benton is detained in surgery. "Cleo is very good with Reese," Benton begins. "We've already covered that," Eyebrows says, not quite under his breath. We rehash that Jackie often picks up the boy and cooks for him. "Jackie's like a mother to Reese these last few months," Peter simpers, ignoring how totally creepy and incestuous that sounds. But at least it's overt, as opposed to the discreet incest being committed by Mark and Elizabeth. Eyebrows raises his and reveals that he's aware Jackie wasn't too receptive to spending time with Reese right after Carla died. This leads to the non-reveal that Jackie's son Jesse was killed recently. Eyebrows casually queries about Jesse's gang ties, which wins an objection from Roma that she loses again. She's the worst lawyer in the world. She'll be in Boston working for Fish & Cage in no time.

When Eyebrows asks how Jackie is coping with Jesse's death, Benton begins to crack. He complains that the questions aren't related to his fitness as a parent, although they are relevant because Jackie had better be stable and reliable if he's going to leave Reese with her so often. Roma objects all over the place. And? Loses. Eyebrows forges ahead, asking if Jackie's seeing a psychiatrist for situational depression and pathological grieving. "She lost her SON," Peter bellows, faced with a similar tragedy himself. "Is [that condition] currently being managed by medications whose side effects include insomnia, sedation and anxiety?" Eyebrows continues. Benton freaks. "Gentlemen!" Judge Alter yells, banging the gavel enthusiastically, because he's only been able to do it once until now. And here, Benton loses his cool completely. "Why don't you ask me what kind of father I am?" he seethes. "Why don't you ask me about how I was there when he was born prematurely, how I stayed in the hospital in the NICU watching over him, making tough decisions and praying over him day and night? Why don't you ask me that?" Roma rockets out of her chair and begs the judge for a recess. "No, why don't you ask me about Reese?" Benton rants. "So I can tell you that there's nothing more important to me in this world than my son? Why don't you ask me that?" Quite frankly, because none of that helps your case at all, Peter. That's what cross-examination is all about. Fair play? Not so much. Roger is stunned at the outburst, the judge looks disapproving, Eyebrows exhales happily, and Benton glares. Cleo tries to do something, but she couldn't wake up from EnergySaver mode in time.

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