ER
Sand And Water

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Sand And Water

Mega props this week to Stee, Jessica, and Megyn for making our visit to Los Angeles so MBTV-tastic, and to Benzoate, the lovely Mrs. B., and their boy Blue for generously allowing Glark and me to crash on theirs, the most comfortable sofa bed in creation, and then for going out, while we slumbered Sunday morning, to get us a dozen Krispy Kreme. Best hosts ever! Mega props to Sars, as well, for covering all the new recaps on my team while I was away. So I'd like to apologize for the lateness of this recap by saying that I was in Los Angeles from midday Friday to very late Monday night. And I'd like to apologize for the crappiness of this recap by saying that I got sick on Sunday night and am still dragging my ass. Now that I've oversold it, on to the recap!

Previously on ER: Carter accused Abby of being on drugs when she accused him of the same thing; then she got her ass bounced out of the ER when her bum ex-husband didn't pay her tuition; Romano peed, and, while doing so, offered Benton a job as a resident on the condition that Benton was "on the team"; and Chen found out she was pregnant.

Wearing an oversized army-green robe and very little else, a very wet Elizabeth "Power Surgeon" Corday stomps up and outdoor flight of stairs up to an apartment buzzer. She angrily punches in a code and is buzzed in.

Seconds later, she's shoving her way shoulder-first into Mark's apartment. Lips set in a grim line, she slams a...parking ticket down on the kitchen table. It doesn't have that much impact. Because it's a parking ticket. You know. It's just a little slip of paper. But still, you can tell she's pissed. "Did you catch her?" asks "Ranger" Mark Greene. Elizabeth spits, "Oh, yes. I caught her. But once she starts writing, she can't stop. Heaven forbid. I should have jammed that pen into her carotid artery." Mark, apparently in a provoking mood, drawls, "I think they double the fine once you draw blood." Elizabeth declares that he needs to move to a building with guest parking. In a tone that suggests that this is an argument they've had several times before, Mark tells her to take his parking spot. She snaps, "I don't want your spot!" Having poured a cup of coffee, she sets it on the counter and goes to the fridge for some milk; she takes the carton out, regards it for a moment, and growls, "Damn." Mark, eating cereal (and, if you will, putting the "milque" in "milquetoast"), ingenuously asks, "What?" She smiles sweetly and replies, "No milk." Around a mouthful of cereal, Mark offers her some of hers. Elizabeth hisses, "A grown man. You put an empty milk carton back into the refrigerator?" He protests that it's not empty. With silent contempt, Elizabeth slams the fridge door and stomps to the sink, where she up-ends the carton and drizzles about a tablespoonful of milk down the drain. "Now it's empty," cracks Mark, unwisely.

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