Cut inside to Denise screaming in pain on a hospital bed. The baby is crowning, and Denise shrieks that she absolutely needs to push immediately. Susan invites her to do just that, while Abby comments that this child is shooting out fast. A cascade of fluid showers an electric unit on the floor. Suddenly, the bed starts rising. Abby and Susan totally bicker about who's responsible for it -- mostly, Abby thinks Susan is touching the pedal, and Susan is denying it -- until Carter finally realizes that the equipment shorted out when the woman's water broke. The woman pants as she elevates. Everyone's all, "Umm....." as they watch the bed go higher and higher. "I can't deliver the baby like this!" Susan exclaims. "Get Luka, he's tall," Abby says calmly. Wow, she's been something of a brat this week, but she also got off some of the best lines. Susan yells for Carter to take over, and bolts outside to find the annoying workman from earlier.
Once she's got the ladder in hand, Susan wheels it into the delivery room. "Oh, you're kidding me," Abby groans. Hey, it's a better solution than getting Luka to stare up this woman's vagina. "What are you doing?" wails the scared mother. "Uh, just setting up equipment," Carter says. The mother frantically begs them not to drop her baby, so Susan reassures her by claiming that Carter used to be in the circus. "Yeah, as a clown, right?" Abby smirks. "Human cannonball," he corrects. "I got fired." The agonized mother reaches up to slap her knee, so happy is she that her current predicament is fodder for Carter's stand-up routine. "Push!" Susan shouts. The umbilical cord is wrapped around the child's neck, so Abby tosses two clamps to Carter and then almost throws scissors, until Carter thinks better of it and has her hand them to Susan. Abby looks bummed that she doesn't get to lob sharp objects at Dr. Righteous's cranium. But the baby is fine, and Susan announces that it's a boy. She holds him up as Carter pats his head and says, "Hi, Mom!" It's actually kind of endearing, especially because that baby is so, so gorgeous. Never mind that he's not crying, not dirty, and not wrinkly and shriveled. This child actor is clearly uncooperative, and will never work in Hollywood again.