ER
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Episode Report Card
Sars: D | 303 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Such Sweet Sorrow

. . . but we cut to Carter bursting into the men's room, tie askew, hair Alfalfa-ed, and slamming into a stall. He shoots the bolt home, slumps down on the toilet, and begins sobbing into his hand while rocking back and forth, horrified at himself. He tries to calm himself down, running his hands through his hair, as we go to commercial.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. I love the Sonicare tooth fairy. Something about the fact that he has little gossamer wings on and a pen clipped to his shirt pocket just cracks my shit up.

Fade back up to Abby and Dave in an OR scrub room, wearing scrubs and watching PPG get prepped for surgery. When Elizabeth "Briton To The" Corday spots them at the scrub-room window, she stalks out of the prep room and over to where Abby and Dave stand: "Why was a critical patient like this discharged from the ER?" Abby gives the excuse that PPG "wasn't critical at the time" and had stable vital signs, and says she thought PPG had PID. (Say that five times fast.) "You didn't appreciate the mass on exam?" Elizabeth asks. Abby admits she didn't. Elizabeth asks Dave if he felt the mass, and when he says that he didn't catch it either, Elizabeth sneers, "What were you wearing, oven mitts?" Abby comes clean about the fact that Dave never actually examined PPG, and when Elizabeth suggests that the two of them take a moment to "get [their] stories straight," Abby confesses that Dave didn't examine PPG because Abby didn't ask him to. Elizabeth sarcastically wants to know if Abby has recently graduated from medical school, and Abby delivers her customary Unapologetic Apology, saying she thought her OB/GYN experience qualified her to handle the patient on her own, but "obviously I was wrong." Elizabeth reviews the facts -- that Dave discharged a patient he hadn't seen, a patient examined and diagnosed by a mere medical student -- and near-shouts, "This woman could have died," adding that Abby is "years away" from having the knowledge "to make these decisions." Abby, aiming for "contrite" but taking a wrong turn at "petulant and sulky," says, "I know," and Elizabeth thunders, "Well, good!" An uncomfortable silence, during which Elizabeth glares at both of them; then Elizabeth dismisses Abby so she can speak to Dave alone. Dave braces for impact and asks if he can "say something" in his own defense, but Elizabeth, staring intently through the window at PPG, thinks aloud that he'd do better "by keeping [his] mouth shut." We see Abby waiting nervously in the next room as Elizabeth turns away from the window and launches into a quiet and deliberate airing-out of Dave. She tells him that, when residents arrive at County, the doctors size them up; they want the residents to succeed, but after awhile, they form opinions about their prospects. Elizabeth asks coldly, "Do you want to know the staff's opinion of you?" and we cut to a shot of Dave, arms folded tightly across his chest, beginning to see where she's going. Elizabeth goes on, "You're lazy, sloppy -- and your careless attitude towards your responsibilities as a physician endangers patients' lives, as witnessed today." Dave looks at his shoes -- it seems evident he's heard this kind of speech before -- but when Elizabeth spikes him in the end zone by finishing, "In other words, none of us thinks you're much of a doctor," he flinches. The woman's got a point, but she also nearly killed a patient herself during her days as an intern, and after her moral- and common sense-free interaction with serial rapist Dean Rollins, I don't know that she should mount that high horse in such a hurry.

ER

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