At the front desk, Susan is tearing Chuck a new one, ostensibly so that he can hurry up and birth his sympathy fetus and stop the bubble, toil, and trouble of his hormones. Chuck is refusing to go talk to Pervy, but Susan swears the guy's going to press charges unless Chuck apologizes. Sure, the punch was a bit excessive, but I can certainly understand why Chuck would be irritated at having to eat crow in front of a guy who was being lewd to the mother of his child. No father would want Chuckus to get felt up that early in life. Meanwhile, Neela is frantically trying to get someone at the nursing home to provide Luis's records. "I'm sorry you've had a bad morning, but he's had an even worse one," she snaps. "Can you fax the med list as soon as possible?"

Cut to Sam and Luka staring at the floor behind a closed door. The caption for this scene, were it a cartoon, would be, "I can't believe it -- this never happens to me." But then Luka pops up his head and suggests a magician for Alex's birthday, and we realize that this was just a tease, and everyone's equipment is working just splendidly. Sam smiles that, last year, Alex asked for a pig embryo he could dissect, so she's not sure a magician is going to tempt him. Then a paramedic bursts through with another van passenger, Lucy, and we see they're in Trauma Other. Luka's called away to help Carter with the van driver, leaving Sam with Lucy. "Paintball?" Luka shouts. "Good idea -- put a gun in his hand," Sam retorts, grinning. And right here is why people on the boards are labeling Alex a freak and a sociopath: Sam's sarcasm here, and about her son's unusual interests, seems to imply that she sort of thinks he's a freak, and that's never a good sign, because aren't mothers contractually obligated to be deluded?

In Trauma Green, Carter and Luka work away on someone we don't care about and who only exists so that Neela can run in and get no answers from them. "Guy next door needs meds, but there's no drug records," she says. Carter tells her to call the nursing home, and she says she has but that she doubts they'll get back to her. Carter and Luka's attention gets distracted by Contrivance, who has begun using the van driver's lung as a backbrush. "He's not breathing!" they yell. No wonder. Contrivance hasn't waxed or cleansed its pimply back since back when Mark Greene had rooting value. Sam bursts in and shouts that Lucy needs a doctor -- her tracheotomy tube came out. Neela takes stock of the situation and charges in there without getting an answer from Carter about her dilemma.