Then, Carter turns back around and calmly rescues Penny's stethoscope again. Whee. He is the real hero.
Ray checks out Funky Monk, and Shane West struggles to look like he knows how to examine a joint. The joint on a leg, not a joint joint. That, I'm sure he could handle with facility. Abby walks up to observe, and asks Funky Monk how many miles he rides on his bike. "Lots," he says. "Lots and lots of riding. I ride here, I ride there, like the wind." Abby stares at him. Ray taps away at the guy's knees to test his reflexes. "There's nothing wrong with my reflexes. I got good re...catlike reflexes. I'm like a cat," he drawls. Abby all but tsks disapprovingly and calls Ray over to one side. "Did you order a head CT?" she asks, kind of rudely. "It didn't indicate," Ray replies. Abby points out that Funky Monk seems a bit "altared." Hee! Thank God I at least make myself laugh. Ray insists it's just a mild concussion; Carter approaches and gets right in the middle of it. Ray thinks the guy's fine, and Abby thinks he's messed up somehow. Carter registers this weirdness, but before he can say anything, a guy comes in with a bullet in his head. He tried to help a store owner during a robbery and got plugged for his trouble. Ray starts to take it, but Carter calls for Abby to run it and orders Ray to get a head CT done on Funky Monk. Ray stops, irritated, as Abby doubles back and snatches GSW Guy's budding chart from his hand. Ray shakes his head, and we fade to black wishing that Ray would do the same. He's like a walking nap.
In Trauma Yellow, GSW Guy is moving further and further away from needing me to document his actual name. "Doll eyes," someone says. Ew. That must mean, "Glassy, with a murderous gleam; full of hypnotically venomous nothingness." A random guy wants an otoscope, and everyone looks up, as if to say, "Who...?" Oh, no, wait, then Abby actually does say, "Who are you?" and thereby confirms that nobody on this show has very consistent, reliable social graces. He introduces himself as Dr. Dubenko, the new surgical Attending. GSW Guy's girlfrend watches tearfully as everybody comes to the realization that he is brain-dead. Abby walks over to her and gently, quietly, explains that he has no neural activity; Dubenko chips in that there's nothing they can do, and that they're very sorry. They all want to notify his family, but the girlfriend sniffles that she's all he's got. There was one moment here where I thought she was going to lie about this -- I don't know if it's just that the actress isn't that good, or if there was supposed to be a measure of suspicion, like she pretended to be his closest thing to family so that she could make something good (get the liver to their dying friend) out of something horrific. But I don't think, as I think some people wondered, that she was hoping for this to happen to get the liver. But I'm getting ahead of myself: Abby basically repeats how sorry they are, and rattles off the tests they need to do on the dead body. "CBC, HIV, ABC, DEFG, LMNOP,WXYZ" she says. "Did I forget anything?" Carter answers, "HIJK, QRS, TUV." Oh, those. Of course.