Ray gets petty with Sam, ordering up a bunch of ridiculous tests for a kid with only a small burn on his finger. When she protests, he brats, "Oh, so you only like to do unnecessary tests on my patients when Abby asks for them." That's revisionist -- they didn't actually know it was unnecessary until they got the results that showed Funky Monk was clean. Ray needs to take his laptop and go somewhere far, far away, where he can revise history over and over again to his imbecilic heart's content. Ray gets a head of steam going on his rant about how his patients are his patients, but Sam spies Luka and immediately walks away while Ray is in midstream. And normally this would be rude, but I am totally giving her a pass because it's Ray she's leaving in the dust. "What are you doing here?" Sam asks. "Carter needs me to cover for Pratt," Luka replies. "Why didn't you say no?" she asks. Luka shrugs.
Frank passes and hands Sam the lab results on the Funky Monk. Wait, I thought Ray said those came back already, and that they were negative. I guess that was just the urinalysis and this is the tox screen.
A woman is wheeled in at that moment with labored breathing. She's not conscious. Sam and Luka wheel her into Trauma Green and try to figure out if she might have had an allergy attack related to food or bee-stings. Hapless Howard, meanwhile, is taking ages to prep some medicine but he finally pushes it, which merits a disgruntled "Finally" from Luka. Sam discovers intense deep bruising around the woman's neck, and Luka pales. "What does that mean?" Howard asks. "It means someone tried to strangle her," Luka says simply. Sam looks down at the woman, whose stars-and-stripes bikini is showing underneath the bruising. "God bless America," she grunts. We fade to black thinking about the sad, trag...no, okay, actually we're thinking, "That is kind of a cute bikini."
When we return, something remarkable happens, ladies and gentlemen: the only two characters on the screen are Weaver and Elizabeth. And they talk. If I didn't suspect this was the work Contrivance, leaving his bloody and aggressive handprint all over what is probably Alex Kingston's exit arc, I might actually be encouraged that the writers remembered to give these two some lines. Elizabeth wants to chat, but Weaver makes a big show of how busy she is, asking Lizzie to make an appointment with her for the morning. Bitch. Elizabeth hurries after Weaver, asking her to listen to her complaints about Dr. Dubenko. Lizzie doesn't think he's working out at all. "No one bothered to tell me you'd hired him," she says, exasperated. "That's what search committees do. Perhaps if you'd been to more meetings..." Weaver says pompously. "I missed one meeting," Elizabeth fumes. "What did you do, wait until I wasn't there to hire the only candidate I didn't endorse?" Weaver blinks and innocently suggests that it's bizarre how personally Elizabeth is taking this. "I'm sure the two of you can work this out," she says faux-reassuringly.