Everwood
A Moment In Manhattan

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Al Lowe: B+ | Grade It Now!
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A Mountain Town
Madison lives in New York now! How convenient and horrible. Ephram is so excited to see her. She is excited that he is there to audition for Julliard. I am not excited by any of it, because she is a big ol' molester, and I hated her storyline from the start. And yet, here she is. Ephram mentions that his dad will be happy to see her as well, and we see Madison's face fall. "Your dad's here, too..." It's not a question.

Speak of the devil, Treat strolls up in the middle of this lovers' reunion. His face also looks a bit bloodless after seeing Madison. Ephram, though, is oblivious, and goes about making plans to "catch up." Uh, yeah, I guess they have a few things to catch up on. Or maybe just one thing.

Speaking of one of those things, back in Everwood, Bright knocks on the door of a pregnant lady's house. It's one of his old girlfriends, and he actually asks her if she's pregnant "or just loading up on the carbs." Ha? He launches into his apology speech. This is the girl who took his virginity, apparently. Except for the part where he uses the gross phrase "took my virginity," it's a nice, if clueless, little speech. The girl says that she appreciates it, and that though she was upset at the time, it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to her. When she poured her heart out to her friend Milo, they ended up being more than friends and got married. "Hey, cool," Bright says. "I get an RBI." He goes on to say that he never saw her as the type who wanted to settle down. Au contraire, Bright. She just "didn't want to settle down with you. You're not the type of guy a girl thinks of building a home with." Bright looks a little crestfallen to hear this. He doesn't seem to feel quite so "great" now. Comeuppance is a dish best served cold.

My one problem with this is: How old is Bright, again? Isn't he like, 19 or something? In which case, why on earth would anybody be thinking of building a home with him? Do Everwood residents age more rapidly than other people? Is that why Delia seems so old? I mean, is it good that this virginity-taker is married and pregnant at the same age? It's just weird, is all I'm saying.

Cut to Treat, arranging to meet Madison on the sly, before we cut back to the Abbott house, where Rose and Patch realize they have accidentally invited both Irv and Edna to dinner. Patch is trying to get rid of Edna when Irv rings the doorbell. Oh, yes, Irv has arrived with a lady friend. This does not go over well with his estranged wife, who starts yelling: "You sure didn't waste any time!" She insults the lady's make-up, her clothes, and her "knockers," before storming out, warning, "He farts like a bull in his sleep."

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Everwood

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