Ephram and Amy are washing Ephram's old beater. I mean, why? Really. Anyway, Amy tells Ephram about the conversation with her dad. Ephram says, "Edna." Amy responds, "Ew? I bring up sex, and you bring up my grandma?" Ephram tells her about the STD test, and says Edna must have told Patch, who told Treat, and the world is conspiring against them. Amy doesn't seem to care about that, and just gets upset that Ephram had the test done without discussing it with her, and says if they can't talk about things like that, then maybe they're not ready for sex in the first place. Ephram argues that it wasn't like that, and he did it for them. He just didn't tell her about it. Amy ain't going out like that, and walks off. And, commercials.
We come back to Ephram berating his dad for giving him a load of crap. Treat says it most certainly was not a load of crap, and that, yes, he knew about the STD test, but everything he said was still true. Ephram: "You know, most of the time, you say the stupidest crap, which really pisses me off, but every once in a while, you actually say something that makes sense. I was actually thinking about taking your advice." Treat says it still doesn't change anything that he knew about the doctor's appointment. Ephram says it does, because the advice came from a false place, motivated by something he doesn't even get. Treat asks what he doesn't get. Ephram wants to know why Treat even cares about him having sex with Amy, when he already knew about his having sex with Madison. Try to get out of this one, Treat. He tries to tell Ephram that, with him and Amy, it's much more serious. Ephram won't have it. Just then, Nina arrives for their fun date. As she walks in the door, Ephram yells, "If I want to have sex, I'm gonna have sex. And I'm not gonna talk to you about it." After he stalks out of the room, Nina says, "I'll just cancel that reservation." Why? Why can't you still go? It's not like Treat and Ephram are still yelling at each other. No fair.
Cut over to Edna's house, where Amy has just arrived to give her grandmother a tongue-lashing. Edna opens the door to an indignant Amy, who greets her, "Hi Grandma! You totally ruined my life." Amy brushes past Edna and walks in. Edna follows her to the kitchen, and says to herself, "Well. This should be fun." Amy fixes herself a cup of coffee and tells Edna that, while it is not totally all her fault, she should have come to her instead of going to Patch, especially after all they went through the year before. Edna, completely confused, says, "Come to you about what? You're making me dizzy, Private." Amy says she knows that Edna knows about Ephram's STD test, and that she told Patch, and now everything's ruined, and the entire population of Everwood knows that Ephram wanted to have sex with her, except for her. Edna: "So you didn't know he was getting tested?" Amy: "NO!" Edna: "Okay. I'm just trying to break this down to basics. So you're upset that Ephram didn't tell you." Hee. Amy says she's upset because the whole thing is just embarrassing. Edna tells Amy that farting in a public restroom is embarrassing; that's not what's got her bugged. "So if you're going to throw a hissyfit at me, at least be honest." Amy admits that she feels like an idiot, because she's been trying to convince herself that she and Ephram were on the same page about sex, and they're not. Edna asks why it matters. Amy doesn't think she can live up to his experience with Madison, and, people, she actually says this: "The girl is four years older than me, clearly way more experienced, and a hell of a lot prettier." These words, spoken by the most beautiful girl in the WORLD. Crazy. Bucky cannot compare. Edna tells Amy to watch it, because "that's my favorite granddaughter you're insulting." Aw. Amy says she tried to imagine that she and Ephram were in the same universe, and the bottom line is, they're not. Edna: "You're in love. That's the only universe that counts." She tells Amy that sex isn't an act you learn how to do once -- it's different with every person, and every time you embark on that journey with someone new, it's scary. She starts to say something about the first time she and Irv embarked, and Amy interrupts, "Oh, Grandma, NO." Hee. Edna says it's all right to be afraid or nervous, because it just means it's important to you. Amy says she doesn't fully believe Edna yet, but she appreciates the thought. They hug. It's sweet. I know I say this every time, but man, Emily VanCamp. Knocking 'em out of the park every single time.













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