Everwood
East Meets West

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East Meets West

Disclaimer of the Recapper: The recapper is currently recapping in a room filled with boxes, paintings, blankets, books, errant bits of furniture which haven't yet been assembled, cleaning products, and tiny miscellaneous crap, with a VCR. The recapper hates you and everyone else who hasn't helped her unpack a box. The recapper wishes she were drunk, instead of downing coffee to stay awake. The recapper wants to hear nothing but love for this tired-ass recap. The recapper's feet are cold. The recapper wants a fucking cocktail, and wishes her good-for-nothing husband would get off his ass and get her one. The recapper is so sure, like crawling under the house and fixing the toilet is work. The recapper dares anyone to talk back.

Pretty mountain and stream scenery. Irv tells us that change is inevitable, and that nature changes...well, naturally. But for people to change, it takes other people. Cut to Ephram, who is looking hot and studying math. Treat tells him that he has to run out for a house call, that the "Dudley" children all have strep. He grins slyly and heads down the stairs, saying he should be back in a couple hours. Ephram commences to freak out, saying he can't babysit Delia tonight. He's all, "But Daddy! You said I could go out and get my new comic books tonight! YOU SAID!" Treat says that Delia is doing her homework, and should be no trouble. Ephram wants Daddy to ask Nina. Because Nina sits around her house just WISHING that someone would call her and ask to babysit. Ephram is still whining when he catches sight of a blonde young thing helping Delia with her homework. He asks Treat, "Who's that?" Treat tries to be all slick about it: "Who?" He tells Ephram that she is the babysitter hired to take care of Delia so that Ephram can "have a life." Neat! Treat introduces them. She's cute, in a blonde Hollywood lip-implant way. Treat tells her that Ephram is going to get some comic books. Ephram tries to act like they're not dorky. The babysitter says that her twelve-year-old brother collects comic books, with the dolls and everything. She's all breezy about it, like, I'm sure she doesn't realize that saying that shit to a teenager is the kiss of death. Dumbass. Ephram says he collects Manga, which is totally different. Delia accuses him of collecting dolls, and he gets all protest-too-muchy: "That's not a doll, Delia. It's a collectible." Sure it is, Tiny Tears. Delia rolls her eyes, and Ephram grabs his sack (hee!) to leave. The babysitter offers to help him with his homework later if he needs it, and to call if he'll be gone longer than an hour. Ephram can't believe his ears. First of all, WE GET IT. Secondly, shut up, babysitter. I hate you. Credits.

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Everwood

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