The Perfect Day

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The Perfect Day

Hello. Everything is still sad. You have been warned.

We open at the Abbott house. Bright walks in with a pretty girl who looks to be at least sixty-five years old, and introduces her to Amy as "Jillian." Hannah walks in obliviously, babbling to Amy about the music she's picked out, until she turns around and Bright introduces her to Jillian and the world goes black. Bright says they're going to get something to eat, and leaves Jillian alone with Amy and Hannah while he gets his wallet. Hannah asks Jillian what her name was, again? Jillian: "Jillian." Hannah: "Ah. Good name. Better than Barbie. I thought your name might be Barbie." Hee. Bright comes back and whisks Jillian away before Hannah can scratch her eyes out.

When they're gone, Amy tells Hannah to just breathe and calm down. Hannah asks Amy if it looks like she cares that Bright only dates perfect women, because she totally doesn't. Amy asks Hannah to help her with her "mix," and Hannah says she can't -- not everyone is a second-semester high school senior. Amy: "Yeah, it's better than you think. The teacher assigns you homework, and you just look at them like, 'Wow, it's really cute that you think I'm actually going to do that.'" She is also relieved because all her applications are in, Ephram's audition tape goes out tomorrow, and now they get to max and relax. Hannah wonders what relaxed Ephram even looks like.

Cut to the Brown house, where we get a glimpse of this elusive relaxed Ephram. He is not there, but the regular kind of Ephram is, and he's trying to get Treat to help him decide which audition tape to send in. Treat says he just can't tell the difference. Ephram says it's the order of the songs -- "If I pick Bach, it says I'm ambitious. If I pick Chopin, it says I'm traditional." Treat: "Which one says you're OCD?" Ephram says it's not funny; presentation counts! "By the way, how do you like my choice of font?" Heh. Treat's phone rings just then, so he is not required to answer that very geeky question. Treat's ringtone is the theme song from Hawaii Five-O. Awesome. Well, awesome until Treat tells Ephram it's not his "everyday ring," and says he'll take the call outside. Now it's just pukey. Treat walks outside, makes a dumb joke, and asks Amanda how San Diego and her mom's house are. Flash to Amanda, who is on the phone in San Diego, and also smoking a cigarette, which…what was even the point of that, pray tell? Amanda's BAD! Anyway, she says she wants to ditch her kid at her mother's, and come home early so she and Treat can have lots of sex and be wrong, wrong, wrong. Treat thinks this is a great idea, and agrees to pick her up the next morning at the airport. Amanda then informs Treat that he will be taking the day off, so they can get a good head start on their shadiness. Treat thinks that this, too, is a great idea, and we go to the credits.

When we get back, it's the next morning in lovely, wintry, snowy Everwood. Ephram is picking Amy up for school, and he does that thing where, every time Amy tries to open the car door, he hits the gas. Amy finally makes it into the car, where she asks Ephram if he sent his audition tape in yet. Ephram says he has, and stops at the light. He tells Amy that he can turn right, and they can head into the world of County High, or he can turn left. Amy asks what's left. Ephram tells his girlfriend, as if she didn't know, that left is freedom and opportunity! "Left is a chance for you and me to spend however many hours doing whatever we want, however we want, wherever we want." Amy finds this idea intriguing, and asks if there will be pancakes involved. Ephram says there certainly will, and adds, "Tick tock, Abbott, the light's about to change." So cute. Amy says they go for it, and Ephram peels out. Oh my God.

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