…There Is A Reaction

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...There Is A Reaction

Fade up on the Abbott House. Amy "Irving" Abbott voice-overs, "Dear Ephram, I know it's weird that I'm writing you instead of calling, but...this feels easier. I don't know, maybe I got used to the email thing while you were in New York; maybe I'm just too scared to pick up the phone, but I think we need to talk." Amy, typing on her computer, stops and backspaces. "Ugh, dumb." She resumes typing, and we see Patch standing in the doorway, observing this display of teen angst. Amy resumes her letter, "But I'd really like to talk to you." Isn't that what she just said? Think twice, post once, Abbott. Patch interrupts just as Ephram signs onto AIM. His screen name is "EphraminNYC" for those of you stalking at home. Amy shushes Patch as she waits, frozen, for Ephram to take some IM action. Patch asks if everything is all right. Amy: "Ephram just signed on. And he sees me! And he knows I see him! This is so insane." Patch doesn't understand, as usual. Amy explains that everything was so great when Ephram first came back, and then everything went wrong, and none of it would have happened if he hadn't gotten that letter. Patch is all, "Letter? What letter? There was a letter?" Amy tells her dad about Ephram's bad evaluation from Juilliard: "And now he says he needs to practice every day, and that he may not have time for a girlfriend, which is totally not true, because I AM REALLY LOW-MAINTENANCE when it comes to that kind of stuff, you know?" Hee. Untruer words have never been spoken. Patch, the best dad in history, replies, "Absolutely." Amy goes on to complain that she has to start her senior year the next day and she doesn't even know if she's in a relationship or not. She turns back to the computer and sighs. "It's like we're standing in the same room and he won't talk to me!" Patch tells Amy to look away from the screen. Amy gets up and throws herself on the bed. Patch tells his daughter that she won't believe it, but she is totally better than this, and that she shouldn't get so wrapped up in one boy that she misses her senior year. Amy tells her dad that he's right. Patch is all, "I know. I am right. Go to bed." After Patch leaves, Amy immediately gets up to check on Ephram, who is still inside the computer. She makes a face as he signs off, and we cut to...

...Ephram, slamming his computer shut: "Dammit." He bangs on it once just as Treat is walking by. Treat tells Ephram that he needs to find something else to bang on, since Treat paid $1800 for that nice computer. Ephram doesn't care. Treat asks if he and Ephram have passed their mandatory cooling-off period, or if they're still fighting. Ephram says he's too tired to think about anything right now, so it doesn't matter. Treat decides to write his own version of the facts: "How about this? We both realized we were wrong, and were on our way to apologize...and now we're all made up, and you can tell me why you were so pissed off, because I know it's not just about me." Ephram tells his dad it's Amy. Treat: "That's it?" Ah, Treat. Not quite the best thing to say to a teenager in looooove. Treat pulls over a chair and asks for specifics. Ephram tells his dad to put that chair right back where he found it, because Ephram doesn't want to talk about it. Treat insists that he can help. Ephram insists that he can't. Delia interrupts this meaningful conversation to tell Treat that Patch is at the door. She says she doesn't know what he wants, but that he's wearing slippers. Ephram tells them both to take their conversation elsewhere. As Treat goes down to see Patch, we get a side shot of Ephram, who has -- blessedly --shaved those hideous sideburns. You may now call me, Ephram.

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