Previously: The Browns move to Everwood, Colorado, after the death of Dr. Brown's wife. Ephram kisses Amy, whose boyfriend just woke up from a coma. Dr. Brown sets up camp permanently in Everwood.
Camera pans over photos of dead Mrs. Brown, as a weird and off-putting VO tells us that one of the hard things about being a father is not knowing what possessions are yours anymore. Is that supposed to be Treat Williams? Because it sounds nothing like him. Whatever. It's supposed to be all homey and heartwarming, but it mostly makes no sense.
The camera pans over to Delia. This little kid is gorgeous. She's also eerily similar looking to the moppet on 7th Heaven. She wakes up and sniffs the air. Cut to Ephram, who does the same thing. All three Browns meet in the hall. Dr. Brown asks if they were cooking. He says it smells great. Ephram snarks that that's why they were suspicious.
Delia runs into the kitchen downstairs. It's their grandparents, the Hoffmans, and they're cooking up a storm. This show got gypped in the music budget department -- everything sounds like third-rate leavings from an after-school special. Dr. Brown is not so pleased to see them, but makes nice and asks when they got there. Grandma Hoffman makes disparaging comments about the small-townness of Everwood. Dr. Brown looks perturbed. Grandma Hoffman looks like something from The Dark Crystal, frankly. In fact, with the exception of Delia, most of the characters on this show kind of look like they were made in Jim Henson's workshop. Scary. Ephram tells Grandma Hoffman he wants two pieces of French toast. She tells him he's wasting away to nothing, and to eat four. Everyone talks about how great it is that the Hoffmans are there. "Sure is," Dr. Brown says through gritted teeth.
Pan over some shots of Colorado mountains. They sure are pretty. And big. And white. Oh -- it's the credits. Duh.
Brown House Of Uninvited In-Laws. Grandma Hoffman is showing Delia some frou-frou dress that she bought for her. Delia looks less than thrilled. She asks if there's anything else. Grandma Hoffman chuckles as if to say, "How cute! I love it when she's unappreciative," and gives her a bag of black-and-white cookies. Mmmm…black-and-white cookies. Then she gives her a Bonne Bell lip gloss so she can keep her lips "shiny and pretty." Isn't she a little young for that? Delia mostly looks confused.
Delia weasels her way out of going to school by saying she wants to show "Nonny" and Grandpa around Everwood. Ephram tries to get in on it, too, but Dr. Brown is having none of it. Dr. Brown not-so-subtly asks Jacob Hoffman how long they're in town for. Jacob calls him on it, in his jovial Grandfather of the Year way. Dr. Brown says he wants to plan for "food and stuff." Jacob points out that it's been months, and he hadn't called them for a visit. Hey! Nonny Nonny says that they'll go to the store, and to pretend that they're not there. Dr. Brown is gritting his teeth so hard you can almost hear the TMJ developing as he says, "I could never do that." He escapes to the office, but not before joking that he'll let Jacob look at some patients if he wants to stop by later. Jacob snips that he couldn't do that, because he charges his patients. Dr. Brown walks away, wondering if he could get away with punching an old man.