Everybody Hates Hugo

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admin: B- | Grade It Now!

Anyway, Claire notices something in the water, rolling in with the tide. She frowns, looks closer, sees it's a bottle. She scoops it up, and looks disappointed (and then concerned) when she sees it's the message-filled bottle last seen in the hands of the rafters heading out looking for rescue.

Jack leads Rose and Hurley into the pantry. Rose is amazed at all the food. Jack says it's only a matter of time before they're going to have to tell everyone what they found down there. "You know what to do?" he asks Hurley, and Hurley says, unenthusiastically, that he's to inventory all of it, and figure out how to make it last. Jack reminds him that until it's been accounted for, no one gets anything, no exceptions; that's Hurley's responsibility. The beeping starts again, in the distance, and Rose asks about it. "You don't want to know," says Hurley.

"Dharma Initiative salad dressing, ranch composite," Hurley reads from the label. "Sounds tasty." The Drifters are playing on the turntable. Hurley finds the Apollo chocolate bars that Kate snagged before, and asks if Rose has ever heard of that kind. "No, but candy is candy," she says. "That's what Bernard always says. Talk about a sweet tooth." Hurley asks her if Bernard was her husband, and she gently corrects his use of the past tense, but Hurley, confused, asks if Bernard wasn't in the tail section of the plane. Yes, says Rose, but Bernard's fine. She can feel it. And they get back to the inventory. "Everyone's going to hate me, Rose," he says. Rose disagrees, saying that Hurley's just about the only one on the island that everyone loves. "That'll change," says Hurley, sadly. Kate strolls in, asking if they found any shampoo. They did, and, despite Hurley's protests, Kate grabs some, brightly says thank-you, and strolls off. "It's just one bottle," says Rose. "This is where it starts," says Hurley.

Flashback to Hurley, in his Mr. Cluck's finery, standing behind the counter, staring some more at his lottery ticket. You know, I can see not cashing a lottery ticket right away. There's a lot of shit I'd have to work out. But I have to think that one certainty would be that I wouldn't be putting on a damn hairnet again, should I work a job that required one. But there's Hurley. One of his co-workers, the new guy, is trying to get his attention. Noticing that Hurley's spaced out, the co-worker, played by DJ Qualls (I'm confused. Is this guy a DJ? Or are those actually his initials?) asks him if he's okay. Hurley says he's fine, but that's about to change, as the boss yells, "Reyes! My office, now!" from off-screen.

Interestingly, the boss is played by the same guy who played Locke's asshole Dave Grohl-look-alike boss Randy from "Walkabout." Only, with the different hairstyle and lack of facial hair, he doesn't look like Dave Grohl; more like…a little Josh Charles-esque, actually. He asks Hurley if he's got anything he wants to tell him, in the manner you do when you know something and you want someone else to confess. Hurley says he doesn't, and Randy II asks if he's sure. Hurley is. So let's go to the tape: surveillance footage from last night, with Hurley sitting down, reading a magazine or something, and helping himself to a piece of chicken. He could even be doing it absentmindedly. Well, eight pieces of dark meat worth of absentmindedly, which is what Randy II says Hurley owes the company. "I didn't eat eight pieces!" protests Hurley, and Randy II asks if he wants to watch the whole tape. And while they're on the subject of Randy II being a total douchebag, stop wasting napkins, Hurley. It's two per customer. Randy II goes on about how "Mr. Cluck's" isn't made of money, and he isn't made of money, and Hurley isn't made of money, because if Hurley is made of money, then maybe he shouldn't be working here. And here's an anvil made of money being dropped on Hurley's head, so when Randy II asks if Hurley's got a problem with that, Hurley quits: "Dude, I quit."

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