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Episode Report Card
Angel Cohn: B- | 776 USERS: B-
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Wipe Out

Trying to get drinks at the bar, Cyrus is depressed until a woman comes over and finds out that he's "with" the surfer crowd, which apparently only consists of Shane and his two friends. Hot random girl wants to learn how to surf. She's making comments about how she should learn on a big longboard. Cyrus says he's got one of those. Subtle.

Bella and Shane are lamely dancing and reminiscing about Mexico. Then she asks him if he's been to Peru recently; he says the story isn't true and not to believe everything she reads. Shane's pals start to get a little rowdy, so they ditch the bar before they get bounced. Where are they going? Who knows, but Shane promises it will be fun. Cyrus is left at the bar with his pitcher of Brandy Alexanders.

Back at Augie's place, he's still shooting Daphne in her "sugar plum fairy dress." It's daylight. I'm confused. Because it seemed like the party that Bella and Cyrus were at was happening at night, and unless Vivian took the longest shower on the planet and this is the next day, time is very weird on this show. Vivian comes out of the shower making spiteful and jealous comments about how pretty Daphne looks. Daphne does make a comment about it being a long shower, but really. It couldn't have been 24 hours. And Augie wouldn't have taken pictures in the same dress for that long. He was only supposed to shoot two roles on each dress. I'm spending way too much time trying to figure this stuff out, especially given that this show took two episodes to explain that Bella lived in her own separate apartment.

At a Wave of the Year event by the beach, there are hot girls and it's daytime. Shane's pushing Bella around in a shopping cart. She's wearing the same dress. Which I guess could mean that the earlier party was during the day, even though it seemed later, or it is the next day or... I just couldn't care less. Bella's worried about returning the cart, she does have to buy her groceries there. Cyrus is showing off a watch that he got for free. He is wearing different clothes. Bella breaks the news that Shane is getting crossed off the list. Cyrus is devastated. It's 4:30 in the afternoon and she's buzzed on the Brandy Alexanders (that she didn't drink). Cyrus decides to scam as much free merch as he can before the money train ends. He talks to Shane's friend Mini-Van, who has wrenched his back. Luckily Cyrus is well-versed in deep tissue massage. One of his many random talents.

Bella tries to break up with Shane, but he's surrounded by press people. She's pulled into the back room where Shane drops the surfer attitude with his marketing people and starts talking business. Bella's baffled. Not uncommon for her. Shane says he'll explain, but he's got to go be "the Animal" for the crowd. What was that "not judging a book by it's cover" nugget, again?

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