Ex List

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Angel Cohn: B | Grade It Now!
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Let's Talk About Ex

At the bar, after the show, Bella doesn't know if she should talk to Johnny or not. Daphne thinks that maybe she's destined to get back together with him and then dump him on Christmas, so he can put out a holiday album. I think I kind of love her. Bella's looking for a sign. Just then we hear a version of "Tainted Love" as Johnny catches a glimpse of Bella out of the corner of his eye. His tattooed, spiky-haired and eyelinered self does a slow walk over to her, kisses the hell out of her against the bar, slugs back a beer and then walks off, leaving her breathless. It's kind of the best thing I've ever seen Eric Balfour do. I may have to change my opinion about him.

Outside the bar with Daphne, Bella admits she's totally turned on. Daphne's car is missing. She parked in a no parking zone. Daph calls Marty for a ride, she walks off. Bella's still standing there when Johnny walks out, she appears to have been waiting for him. He looks kind of disgusted and unimpressed. Then there's flirty banter, she liked his music, he likes her eyes. Then he leaves.

The next day Bella's watering her plants and regaling Cyrus with her latest dating disaster. He says Bella's only interested in Johnny because he doesn't want her any more. Inside the house Augie and Vivian are still fighting about her crotch issues, and now they've moved on to his sideburns. Stupidest fight ever. Which leads to the revelation that Bella has a disgusting mole on her back. Cyrus wants to see, so does Augie. We don't see it, but they are both disgusted. Elliot shows up to take Rufus for a walk. Now they have a passive-aggressive conversation about their break-up, lack of marriage potential and their still-lingering feelings. Her roomies listen, but pretend not to. The boys thing her mole moved when Elliot shows up. They've decided to call it a skin nugget, which is gross but funny.

Now Bella's got on her most groupie-looking outfit, which consists of a flowery shirt and a nearly non-existent skirt. Johnny wants to know what her damage is. He kind of wants her, but he also kind of still hates her and wants revenge. She turns on the sexy. She's changed in the past seven years, she's more thoughtful and open and concerned about other people. And of course, it's his birthday, and she didn't remember, or look at a calendar. But his band is giving him cake.

Then we see Bella singing badly into her cell phone. She's at work, and hopes he's having a swell party. She hears a noise and heads to the front gate, and there's Johnny. He heard her off-key warbling and thought maybe she was choking. Smooth. He offers to help her finish up, which includes him looking at all the flowers for Daphne's wedding and learning the meaning of them all. Which somehow turns him on and they are making out against the refrigerator case and then suddenly they are naked on a couch somewhere. He's now crying about how much he missed her. Ink or no ink, he's still super-sensitive. She looks freaked out.

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