MONDO EXTRAS

Beauty and the Beast: Pilot Review

by Angel Cohn October 11, 2012 10:00 PM
Fall Pilot Season 2012: <I>Beauty and the Beast</I>

We flash-forward to present day, where she's a detective in New York City (stop laughing) and uses her police privileges to get a plum parking spot for the movies. Of course, she meets her boyfriend, who promptly dumps her for having a demanding but hot job and because he doesn't like that he can't smoke pot around her. He says he cancelled their date via text, and you'd think this meant she forgot her phone or something, but after she gets him busted for possession, she immediately picks up her cell phone. So was she just pretending that she didn't get the text? Or did she show up to mess with him (which her initial apology about being late would seem to indicate is not the case)? Or does she just not know how to check her text messages? Going with the latter.

She shows up at a crime scene to meet her partner Tess (Nina Lisandrello), who says she should have tased the guy who was only into her for the handcuffs, apparently. Tess has a terribly thick New York accent that is so muddled it could be from any of the boroughs. Tess is on a man cleanse, because guys are just the worst. They turn away from their personal discussion to do their jobs, which involves checking out the murder victim in the middle of an upscale hotel and discussing her pricey Louis Vuitton handbag.

Looking at the security footage with her boss Bishop (Brian White), they see that the victim was injured prior to stumbling into the hotel. So while the concierge is all uppity about the fact that it's a nice hotel, clearly someone didn't do their job. Tess reassuringly comes over to identify the victim as Ashley, the editor for some made up fashion magazine, a fact she learned from Google. Our tax dollars at work, everyone. Catherine fills in the info that the victim's husband is a famous photographer and the two were fodder for Page Six. Guess someone has time to read the Post when she's not solving crimes.

Using some very fancy computer technology, they take the fingerprint they found on a button and enlarge it to reveal that it belongs to a once Vincent Keller. Turns out that he is a dead doctor who was killed in Afghanistan. He was an ER resident at St. Benjamin's and when Catherine pulls up his picture, she just stares at it for a very long time.

At the hospital, a helpful nurse happily spills that Keller was a nice, not-cocky-at-all doctor who lost his brothers on 9/11 and spent the whole day waiting for them to show up. Then he disappeared and stopped working, and apparently went to war. When they ask the nurse if she's seen him, she looks at them like they are morons. While this may not be far from the truth, they move on to ask if he had any friends that he might have reached out to. He was anti-social, but he had a roommate named J.T. (Austin Basis), who is a chemical researcher and lives in some old decrepit factory near a Brooklyn Bridge that is about the size of the one in Las Vegas. Catherine jokes about him maybe running a meth lab, giving Tess a chance to poke fun at Catherine's poor taste in men. It's this show's idea of a running joke, apparently.

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