Farscape
Farscape

Episode Report Card
Strega: B | 1147 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
You Know, For Kids

In what we'll pretend is another corridor, Chiana is consulting D'Argo. She still thinks that Aeryn is hiding a secret message on the beacon. D'Argo takes the idea and runs with it, speculating that Aeryn's trying to turn them all in to Scorpius. Chiana wonders if Aeryn's working with Crichton. D'Argo shakes his head rapidly and exhales, because I guess he wanted to show off his chicken impression just then. He says that they'll have to get off Moya to be safe. Before he can continue that thought, Zhaan walks into view, and Chiana ducks away as she grumps, "You deal with it." D'Argo turns and asks Zhaan what she wants, and she duhs, "More light." D'Argo asks if she's working with Crichton, and Zhaan sneers, "What are you talking about?" and walks away. D'Argo calls her back and, when Zhaan turns, he gives her a tongue-lashing. You know, in that way he does. Zhaan collapses, and Chiana jumps out and boggles. D'Argo says, "She's definitely working with Crichton." Chiana agrees: "Definitely."

Meanwhile, Pilot is running down to a weary Crichton what he sees as the defects in the human species. Pilot admits, "I'm only judging based on my experience with you." Pilot, we don't all have crazy hair: honest. Crichton asks if Pilot's run a scan on the pulsar light. Pilot asks, "How do humans make it through a cycle -- even half a cycle -- without killing each other?" Crichton grunts, "We find it difficult," and asks again about the scan. Pilot, undeterred, notes, "You're not particularly smart, can hardly smell, can barely see, and you're not even vaguely physically or spiritually imposing." He asks if there's anything humans do well, and Crichton suggests, "Watch football." Pilot says that nobody trusts him, although sometimes the others pity him for his incompetence. Heh. Crichton starts to climb up onto Pilot's console and fiddle with it in an attempt to run the scan himself. Pilot starts flapping at him and grumbling, "Don't touch my console!" They start playing patty-cake and yelling at each other until something on the console goes kerblooey, tossing Crichton onto the floor. Pilot sighs, "I warned you." Crichton hops to his feet wearing Confused Expression #17, and asks Pilot what's wrong. So, doing violence to Crichton kind of wakes him up. Only on this show can you actually beat some sense into people. Pilot insists that he's fine, and Crichton confirms that the pulsar light doesn't reach into Pilot's hidey-hole: "You can't actually see the light. So why are you being affected by it?" Pilot snaps that it isn't affecting him. Crichton yells, "I've been in the light, Zhaan's been in the light, but..." He snaps his fingers to indicate an epiphany, and marches out.

Farscape

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