Exodus From Genesis

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C+ | Grade It Now!
Aeryn Wide Awake In the Garden

D'Argo carries Aeryn onto command, still asking Pilot where Zhaan is. Pilot can't help with that, but he can offer the lovely news that "a growing number of bipedal entities" are now wandering the ship. "Who knows how many more there are," murmurs D'Argo, and John answers as he enters: "Infinite." He holds up his own dead head: "Minus one." I guess he stopped fighting fair. D'Argo asks how he can be sure it's really John, and John says that he's talking, so you know. "If they could [talk], they wouldn't tell you that these markings are useless." D'Argo asks John where Rygel is. John asks D'Argo where Zhaan is. Nobody knows. Nobody ever knows anything on this ship. D'Argo says there were signs of a struggle, and she's gone, and who cares about D'Argo or Zhaan or Rygel or even Moya, because Aeryn's delirious: "Did we pass the obstacle test? I don't want to fail Commando training." (a) Not for at least three more years, and (b) Dude, we know. You passed. Flying colors. Stop passing.

D'Argo points out that they're getting isolated, and John says they've gotta find Zhaan and stick together. Rygel comms the yotz with Zhaan, he wants out of the wall. John asks for Rygel's 20 with an angry grin, and Rygel bitches about the bugs and stuff. "If I sit perfectly still, they don't advance. Yet, when I move, they get disagreeable." May I suggest the cha-cha? D'Argo suggests he stay still, and Rygel somehow summons yet more attitude: "If we ever survive this, Luxan, you must become my advisor!"

Rygel lets them know that the thing is spitting out clones at a phenomenal rate, and we see slo-mo Johns, D'Argos and Zhaans stumbling out of the nest. I'm so tired of the slo-mo already! We get it! They are spooky! They were already spooky! John's like, "But we already lose, though, so why?" Zhaan interrupts him, shambling into command with the huge thing sticking out of her neck, almost laughing with the direness: "Help me. I can't, uh..." The boys grab her and she's all having vapors. "I can't get this stinger out, it's pumping some kind of venom into me." It's pretty worrisome. Of course D'Argo's like, "I'll cut it out!" and John reaches out to stop him, and then Zhaan changes. She's tall, and regal, and a little bit scary.

"I am Monarch of the Drak," says the lady. It was supposed to be "Sultana," for that vague Arabian flair, but Virginia Hey is Australian, and she was like, "Nigella said that means a golden raisin, and you are not calling me a raisin." Also, if you're a woman over 35 and let them call you a raisin, Sela Ward will come to your house for selling out the sisterhood (because a woman with her bone structure is in the ideal position to talk about the beauty of aging gracefully, because she WILL NEVER AGE). I don't know why I know that story, but I do know every time this episode comes up, I think of Rygel climbing up a uterus, and then I think of Zhaan, Queen of Raisins. "These are my aggregate," says the Raisin Queen, pointing at the fake D'Argo, John, and Aeryn walking onto command. "You attack me, during my Genesis, and you must die." Freaked-out John says to freaked-out D'Argo: "What the hell is Genesis?" D'Argo draws his sword thing, and John grabs him. D'Argo just wants to chop her up, but John's like, "Actual Zhaan! Actual Zhaan!"

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