Mental As Anything

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C- | Grade It Now!
In This Dojo

Rygel is gasping and groaning and drooling; in the arena, the ball's right in his face. "Excuse me, Master Jedi? Looks like Sparky's losin' more than a few brain cells in there." Katoya's like, "Indeed." John asks if there's real danger just as Rygel screams and goes into some kind of seizure. John orders Katoya to stop the game, Katoya's like, "It's Rygel's call," which I appreciate, but that's not good enough for Johnny: he turns to D'Argo all, "Okay, let's get him out." Katoya Jedi's them across the room again, and inside the arena, the Charrid's got the ball right up in Rygel's face for a good long time, causing all kinds of pain and foam, but Rygel finally spikes it right into his forehead, ending the game.

D'Argo carries Rygel into the refectory like a tiny little farting baby: "He's like ice." John advises D'Argo to keep him covered, and turns up the stairs to bitch at Katoya for not "stepping in before somebody got hurt." John's being really horribly American right now. Katoya tries, once again, to explain about adults and how adults make choices and how you let them because they are adults, but John's not hearing it, and he starts talking about leaving again. "Your training isn't over," Katoya tells him, and John's all, "Oh, yes it is," so Katoya Jedis him down the stairs hardcore and he passes out on his stupid face. "It's just begun." Dude, I hope they fuck him up. John's being unbearable in this episode.

Macton bows to Katoya -- "Master" -- and the class sits. Scorpius and D'Argo come in last, D'Argo giving Katoya the hairy eyeball, and Scorpius explains that John's fine: "He's been moved to remedial training." D'Argo turns his stink-eye to Macton as Scorpius comments that Rygel's recovering. D'Argo: "Yeah, I wasn't thinking about that, either." Um, cool? Scorpius nods at Macton and says he's quite aware, but maybe he should be like the other grown men in the room and stop acting like Crichton: "Attempt to remain focused on your more immediate tasks first." Doesn't seem like he's asking a lot, does it? D'Argo growls at Scorpius and Katoya asks, once again, for him to get classy. D'Argo glares at Scorpius and stalks off; Scorpius begs him to stay focused.

Then: Lo'Laan calling D'Argo's name, trying to wake him up. "D'Argo, can you hear me?" she says, again. He sits up, and his first question is this: "Did I hurt you?" She kneels before him and shakes her head. "I know this upsets you." He reaches out to touch her face. "It upsets you too." She smiles and promises they'll get through this. "If I did hurt you, you'd tell me. Wouldn't you? You promised." She says the following: "You never hurt me, D'Argo." Which isn't an answer, at all. "But you'd tell me if I did." She smiles again, with something behind it. Something broken, and secret. And she strokes his face. "Absolutely. I promise I'd tell you." Now I remember why I can't ever remember the resolution of this major character arc! It's bullshit, that's why. There's no way to believe, against the evidence of the episode and the Luxan facts, that he didn't hurt her, but the episode goes off at the last second and asks you to believe just that. In an early draft, it turned out that he did kill her, and you know what, frankly -- given all the resonances and fears that we're setting up now -- that would be more satisfying, albeit even more racist than what we're looking at now.

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