We're So Screwed (3): La Bomba

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
"Love You." "...Love You, Too."

But also, between Scorpius last week and now Ahkna, Aeryn's getting some competition in the "rubbing up on John Crichton" sweepstakes that once was her proudest and most admirable accomplishment. Credits.

PA talking ugly Scarran talk, 1812 dancing around in a room and assuring John it's bug-free. "Good boy." Scorpius follows John into the room for his come-to-Jesus. John cocks Winona and shows her to Scorpius's face, then lays her gently down on the table. Got it? "Okay, convince me." Crystherium Utilia, Scorpius says, and then a flashback to him touching the flowers. "Very important." John's like, seriously. "That why they're growing them in the Bat Cave?" Scorpius nods, remembering that John's been down there. "Listen up, Grasshopper: I finally have a plan that works. It's simple! We get in, we break bread, we see the sights, we grab you, we get out. And now you're gonna throw flowers at me?" Scorpius is like, yeah. "We need to destroy the Crystherium!" John sighs and shakes his head: "Flowers trump wormholes?" Scorpius says that, at the moment, they do. And they do. And they always do. And this entire scene takes way too long, but we've gotta get back to Harvey, gotta play Find The Lady with Scorpius, and gotta play up the whole plot of this episode, which is that flowers trump bombs, in a way where it doesn't sound all Kent State stupid.

John cups a smoke and lights it with a Zippo, across from Harvey at a desk like in Homicide. (I don't know if that's the reference, but I do know Homicide was Farscape with cops, and that the Wire people are at least as scary as Farscape or Veronica Mars people, with similarly good reason.) Harvey is wearing a knitted cap over his mask, like a perp. There are flashes of crazy, and John tells Harvey no smoking in his head. I wonder -- this isn't the first time John's been angry and weird about smoking -- what kind of cancer it was, with Leslie. Do we ever know for sure? I know lots of people like that. John busts Harvey across the face and knocks his coffee right out of his hand. They front on each other at length and finally John indicates the Bird of Paradise plant on his desk, and Harvey laughs. "The number-one secret in the whole Scarran Empire. Huh! Even the Charrids and the Kalish haven't figured its real deal." Harvey sits back, crossing his arms over his chest, secure in the knowledge that, crappy American accent aside, Scorpius and Harvey are one of the most indelibly wonderful villains in the history of television.

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