Fastlane
Fastlane

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | 578 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Ryde Or Die

Back at the club, Aquarius tells the boys the score, and that he's not a drug pusher. Deaq says that Gavin takes refection pretty well as they watch Gavin walk out. Gavin walks up to the two guys who clocked the bouncer and orders, "Do him." Maybe he should have been more specific there, because I just got a scary mental image. Suddenly, there are three guys (who I'm just going to call Gavin's Boys), so maybe I just wasn't paying close enough attention earlier. I was distracted by the bad Cockney accent. Two of them reach into their coats for their guns. Aquarius tells Van and Deaq that no one should mess with him. Van notices a laser sight on his hand, and looks to find the source. He sees one of Gavin's Boys pointing a gun right at Aquarius's head. The camera goes down the barrel of the gun and then follows the bullet across the room. Which would be super-cool if I hadn't seen it, like, two years ago in that Korn video. I mean, it's still cool, but it's hardly original. Van pushes Aquarius down, and the bullet hits some bottles on the ledge behind them. The club patrons start freaking out and stampeding out the door, which helps to keep them from getting any closer to Van, Deaq, and Aquarius, who are scurrying off behind the bar. The song in the background states, "The revolution will be televised," which seems kind of played-out as far as themes go. Deaq tells Van that there are three shooters. Van pops up over the bar. One of Gavin's boys shoots and takes out some random dude. Van and Deaqon jump out from behind the bar. There's all kinds of shooting in both slow and regular motion. I'm no puritan, but I can't believe how much violence there is this week. Not to mention the John Woo-style gun-fetish crap featured when Deaq hopped out with two huge guns with extremely long barrels. Van manages to shoot one of Gavin's Boys. Outside, patrons run down the street, and then Gavin walks by with a smile on his face. And...credits. The show's theme song is really terrible. Like almost as bad as the theme song from the last season of Road Rules.

Candy Store. Billie toys with a cigarette while she tries to figure out why Van and Deaq have nothing to show for their gunfight with Gavin's Boys. Van gives the excuse that there were bystanders. Didn't seem to stop them from shooting while jumping over bars and such, from what I saw. Deaq says that Aquarius is going to shut down his club for a while. They promised Aquarius that the case would end right. Billie asks how they plan on doing that. Van and Deaq have an idea: they want to open their own nightclub and hope that Gavin approaches them about selling drugs there. Billie thinks for a minute, and then says that she loves it, because "if it works, Gavin goes down for drugs, not some trumped-up, money-laundering, tax-evasion charge." She tells Van and Deaq to make it happen, and to spend whatever they need to in order to do it right. Van and Deaq are happy and also surprised that Billie agreed so readily; they start to walk out. Billie calls them back and says that she wants to make it clear that this isn't just an excuse for them to score free drinks and hot women. She explains that she wants Gavin to go down, and that if they screw it up, they will be replaced. Billie puts the cigarette to her mouth and lights it. Van whispers to Deaq, "She just lit up." Deaq agrees, "If she lit up, we better nut up." I can see where this episode would have made a lot more sense if it had come right after the one where Billie said that quitting smoking was harder than kicking heroin and all that, instead of, like, two months later.

Fastlane

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