Things Done Changed

Episode Report Card
Kim: C- | Grade It Now!
Things Done Changed

Van and Deaq pull up to Alton and Rosaria's house. Van is wearing a bizarre leather fedora, but maybe it's his Run DMC tribute, so I'll let it slide. Van asks Deaqon about his tattoos. Deaqon says that he's supposed to be an ex-con, and ex-cons have tattoos. Deaqon asks Van about his hat, and Van has no excuse for it. Deaq rings the doorbell, and Rosaria answers and says that her husband isn't home. Deaq says that she's lying. Van says they want to meet "the myth, the man, the legend." Van says that Deaq claimed to be Alton's cousin, and Deaq says that he is. Van starts yelling Alton's name into the house. Alton shows up and asks what the yelling is about. Deaq says that they're related. Rosaria explains that they're cousins, and Alton invites them in. Van notices that Deaq and Rosaria are linking pinkies.

Out on the back patio, Rosaria serves the men drinks. Alton lights a cigarette. Deaq makes a comment about how he missed drinking beer when he was in Chino for eighteen months. Wow, that was a smooth segue. Not. Deaq says he heard when he got out that his baby cousin married Alton White, and that he had to come see for himself. Alton says that Deaq must know Two Tears. Deaq says that he heard Two Tears was doing twenty years in Lompoc, which is a long way from Chino. Alton says that Two Tears got transferred to Chino about six months ago, and he knows everyone, and everyone knows him. Deaq says that he knows the name, but that Two Tears wasn't in his gang. Van tells Deaq to ask him. Alton asks what they're talking about. Van says that they want to know if Alton has any jobs lined up, because they need work. Alton asks Van's story. Van says that he never got caught or went to prison, and that's the end of his story. Alton laughs and says that he doesn't "take on stray dogs unless [he] know[s] they can do some tricks." Deaq says that they have a strip club they've been waiting to hit. Cut to various clips from the opening scene of the show, so now we know what that was all about.

Right Now. Van and Deaqon arrive at a huge house. Deaq tries to bid Van farewell, but Van walks right in and checks the place out. Deaq says he'll only be there two weeks. Van accuses Deaq of having something going on with Billie to get such a nice house when Van lives in a hotel. Van walks off to check out the gourmet kitchen. Van says that he's going to "get [his] Chef Van-ardee on" and cook some spaghetti. Deaq claims that black people don't like spaghetti, and then says that he's tired, and that he wants to relax and get his mind right. Furthermore, he wants to "hit the silk, dream of Jeannie." Normally, I don't quote the stupid slang on this show unless it's particularly stupid, but this one comes up again later, so I needed to mention it. Deaq says that it's nothing personal, and Van leaves.

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