Oops…Noel Did It Again

Episode Report Card
Kim: B- | 2 USERS: A
Oops...Noel Did It Again

Richard and Elena show up at the loft, on a mission to delete that message. Sean answers the door, wearing a vest made out of playing cards. Richard asks whether they want to hear a secret, and bursts in uninvited. So I guess he's not a vampire. Sorry, I've been watching those double shots of Buffy on FX. Anyway, Richard very obviously gets Sean and Meghan (who is still in the Jackie Kennedy wear) to face him in the living room in order to announce his secret while Elena tries to sneak over to the answering machine. Meghan guesses that Richard is coming out, which offends Richard. Elena manages to press the right buttons, and the machine announces that the messages are deleted. Meghan wonders what's going on, and Elena pretends that it was an accident. Elena and Richard leave in a hurry, saying that the secret wasn't that important anyway. As they leave, Elena says, "Bye, Sean!" Richard says, "Bye, Meghan!" This gives Sean the idea to call their company "Schmegan" because it combines both of their names. All that reminded me of was "smegma" and if you don't know what it means, look it up. Trust me -- it's nothing you would want to name a company after.

Ben watches as doctors try to help his father to breathe. Ben and Lauren walk outside. Lauren keeps saying that Jack made his wishes very clear. Ben says that his father is in pain, and that Ben didn't ask for power of attorney to begin with. I can't believe that Ben wouldn't call his mother. I know his parents are divorced and all, but you'd think his mother would be able to help him out a little bit. Ben walks away. Lauren asks where he's going, and Ben angrily retorts, "If he doesn't want to be saved, I'm not going to save him."

Ben storms into the loft, where Noel sits reading the paper. Noel asks, faux-innocently, "Hey, who was that girl?" Ben doesn't know what Noel is talking about, and gives Noel a look like, "Now is not the time to piss me off, lonesome loser!" Noel explains that the girl had a big bouquet of flowers. Ben says that he's "not in the mood for this crap," and walks toward his room. Noel doesn't take the hint, adding that Felicity said Ben was with his dad, and then Noel saw Ben hugging some girl on the sidewalk. Ben stops and turns around, and angrily says that she's a friend of his dad's, not that it's any of Noel's business. Yeah! It's none of Noel's business! You go, Ben! Noel says that it is, because Felicity was alone on her birthday. Ben yells, "Look, you don't know what you're talking about, so just drop the best-friend crap, all right? We all know what you're doing!" Noel asks what that is. Ben says that Noel graduated and took the job as a counselor, so it's obvious that he's just waiting around for Felicity. Noel says that he's not waiting around for anyone, and that he just can't get a job. Ben points out that Noel took a job right down the hall from Felicity. Ben testifies, "Come on, man. Give it up. It's been years! She was never yours. She never will be, so just accept it and move on. You're never gonna have her." Noel replies, "I already did."

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