Episode Report Card
Maggie: B- | 1 USERS: A-
Ding Dong, the Witch Is Dead

Previously on Felicity: Elena fell for a guy she couldn't see, and when she did get a look at him, she wasn't sure she liked what she saw; Felicity sobbed to Knoll that she thought she and Ben broke up; Avery planted a kiss on Ben in the Hamptons (that's funny, because I thought she kissed him on the lips); Ben told Felicity that nothing happened with Avery.

At the loft, Knoll and Sean are sitting across the table from each other while Knoll practices having a job interview. Sean is wearing several Bioré-type strips on his chin, cheeks, nose, and forehead. In his role as interviewer, he asks Knoll, "Mr. Crane, give me a situation in which you failed, and how you handled that." Knoll, big dummy that he is, doesn't believe that he would be asked such a question in an interview. That's a softball question, you knob. Sean assures him that'll be a question, and when Knoll protests, Sean informs him that he went to "Harvard Business School...summer program." At this point, the strip on his chin is loose and about to drop off. Knoll asks him what the things on his face are. With his chin strip firmly affixed again (hey, Continuity, you're fired), Sean replies, "Pore suckers. I've got a big event coming up." I think "poor suckers" may apply to the people who think those things work miracles. There's a knock on the door. Knoll opens it to find Avery "Rasputin" Swanson, wearing a high-necked, buttoned-down shirt covered with various rectangles of green, teal, and turquoise. It is hideous. Not only won't Avery die, but neither will this 1970s-era monstrosity, which was last seen on my grade-three teacher, Miss Sonley, in our class photo. Sean pulls the strip off his chin, shouts with pain, and then runs out of the room. Avery, of course, wants to see Ben. When Knoll says that Ben isn't home, Avery stands there until Knoll invites her in. Because her being inside the apartment will somehow make Ben less absent. She wants to know whether Ben has received any of the messages she's left for him. Knoll claims to have given them to him and then implies Ben's negligence simply because, well, "you know Ben." Avery whines, "No, I don't." She mumbles incoherently about Ben, and Knoll helpfully points out that Ben "can be pretty irresponsible sometimes." So Knoll is still discussing Ben and his life even though he has been warned not to. Knoll deserves a good hiding. Avery whines that she's confused because she and Ben "had a really good time" in Southampton. Knoll gets all shifty-eyed and jump-to-conclusiony and asks whether "something happened" between them. Perhaps wanting Knoll to think the worst, she replies, "Yeah." How long will it take before Knoll imparts this little bit of information to Felicity?

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