Wash and Mal return to the ship for the night. Zoe exposits to them that their contact is "chomping at the bit" for the goods. Mal explains that there have been complications. Because there are always complications in their missions. Wash explains to Zoe the news about the hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne. Zoe practically recoils when Wash puts his hand on her shoulder. Zoe observes that Wash is drunk. Mal agrees that Wash is, but his story is nevertheless true. Mal has arranged for the mudders to have a Jayne Day celebration in the town square tomorrow. Wash busts up giggling at the idea. Mal believes that the distraction will allow them to get the goods out of town without getting noticed. Yes, but what about Jayne? He's a "hero" for breaking the law. Why doesn't it even occur to Mal that the magistrate might try something? Or perhaps he doesn't care.
Back in Inara's Shuttle Of Tea And Sympathy (And Sex), Fess whines that the whole situation is embarrassing. Inara After-School Specials that there's nothing wrong with being a virgin and that there's nothing wrong with Fess. She explains that companions choose whom they're going to "be with" very carefully. She would never "be with" Mr. Higgins, because he's old and ugly. But she would "be with" Fess, because he's young and rather hot. She takes off Fess's glasses and kisses him.
Back at the bar, Jayne is hanging out with GayMudderRick and some nameless woman designed to keep the episode from going all Queer as Folk. GayMudderRick explains that the magistrate tried to get the money back, but all the mudders rebelled. So the magistrate allowed them to keep the money and called it a "bonus." Then, when the magistrate tried to have the statue of Jayne destroyed, the mudders rioted. Jayne has descended well into friendly drunk mode, and pulls GayMudderRick and BeardLady in for a big hug over the fact that they all rioted for him. Woo hoo! Three-way!
Elsewhere, Herr Mudkoff has come by to see Higgins. Higgins says, "My son is out there. I pray to god, losing his cherry." Ew! Ewwwwww! Ewwwww! Herr Mudkoff gives Higgins the news that Jayne's come back to town.