Fraternity Life
Northern Exposure

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Uncle Bob: F | Grade It Now!
Northern Exposure

The pledges show up at line-up. George asks if they found the sword. They're giggling; he asks why they're laughing, and says he will de-pledge every single one of them right now without a single thought. This causes them to laugh even more because they've learned that every single thing George says is an empty threat, geared to scare them straight, and that there's no way he'll de-pledge them all because then not only do they not have a pledge class for 2002, but MTV doesn't have a show for the fall schedule and you just don't piss off MTV. George points out that the sword is in their hearts for all the heart they've shown throughout the whole pledge process. Okay, by now I'm weeping like Shirley MacLaine at the end of Terms of Endearment. This is just too goddamned touching. Mike says they showed a lot of group effort. George says they busted their asses, and that the brothers saw that for the first time. Brad is conspicuously absent until we see footage of him molesting a young Laotian boy in the suite's hot tub.

The guys all go out to a club, where they dance together and rub up against each other and hug and all that. You're damned skippy Brad's there absorbing all this HoYay, having strangled the Laotian kid and hid his limp body in the hotel's laundry chute. Afterwards Mags says in a POV that the pledges [bleep] a [bleep] but that they [bleep] a [bleep] for the next three [bleep]. Wow. That's a shocker. A graphic tells us that there's still three weeks left in the pledging process. Anything can happen in those three weeks. Personally, I'm hoping for a debilitating stroke. For myself.

Next week, we get to see Tim's side of the story about his break-up with the frazzled poodle girl Nicole from Sorority Life, and Lindsey is back to torment Alex some more. Please God. I know I ask for a lot from you. But please, if you could...strike me dead before next Wednesday evening at 10:30/9:30 Central, I would be eternally grateful. Thank you.

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Fraternity Life




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