Freaks & Geeks
Freaks & Geeks

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Dead Dogs And Gym Teachers

In Gym class, Sam and Neal are sitting together on the bleachers. Neal calls Biff "Bill's future dad." He says he can see why Biff is dating Gloria, since "she is kind of hot." Sam is shocked and offended by the fact that Neal is discussing his friend's mother in a sexual way. I think Neal's right about Gloria, and I'm not particularly shocked, though I wouldn't be surprised if, because of his philandering dad, Neal may grow up with an issue or two about sex. Biff claims that the class contains a few "potential basketball superstars," some of whom might even make the team. He's staring at Bill, who rolls his eyes. Fredricks orders the boys to warm up by running ten laps around the gym. Hurrah! We get to watch Bill run some more! Or maybe not. Bill tells Mr. Fredricks he can't run. He adds, "I have better things to do than run around a gym and shoot a stupid ball in a hoop." Biff asks what better things Bill has in mind. Bill replies, "Anything. Pick my nose and eat it, or read the comics, or go to the bathroom. Anything is better than Gym class." Word, Bill. I'm all for exercise, but I can't see how forcing people who suck at team sports to play the hated sports in question ever did anyone any good. The class is laughing with Bill -- except for Alan the Bully, who tells Biff to "kill him." Biff goes up even higher in my estimation when he turns on Alan and tells him to shut up. Even that doesn't impress Bill, who gets up to leave. When Biff warns Bill that he'll be in "big trouble" if he goes, Bill sing-songs back, "What are you gonna do, tell my mom?" Biff is speechless. Fickle Alan laughs and whispers, "Never thought I'd say this, but Haverchuck's the king!"

Goliath does, indeed, get a funeral, at which Millie gives a touching speech saying that he's in heaven now. She invites Lindsay to give a eulogy. At first, Lindsay feels too guilty to say anything, but Kim, who is crying, pushes her to make a speech. Lindsay starts awkwardly, but by the time she gets to the part about Mom Weir going to Millie's house wearing furry boots which Goliath would hump, all three girls manage to laugh a little. Lindsay finishes off her eulogy by saying that Goliath lived "a long and happy life." She stresses the word "long," her guilt obvious.

Freaks & Geeks

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