You are a turd. A stinky fat turd. Go sniff a jock strap, you poophead. You love patting boys' butts -- patting boys' butts, you butt patter. You're a perv and a loser and a stinky turd.

Hey, didn't Beck use those lyrics in a song once? But I digress. It turns out that Biff isn't alone this time. A woman is sitting beside him on the couch, and she asks who was on the phone. Biff meekly says, "It was just an old friend." Meanwhile, Sam tells Bill that he better hope that Biff doesn't find out Bill did the calling. Neal warns, "If the cops trace the call, you are so dead." Bill points out that if the cops trace the call, Neal is dead. Sam laughs.

Kim and Daniel are walking together down a tree-lined street; Kim is complaining that Lindsay is a princess and that the Weirs don't want her bespoiled. Daniel makes it clear that he is tired of talking about it and listening to Kim talk about it. Kim steps in dog poop as Daniel tells her that he can understand why the Weirs are nervous. Way to add insult to injury, Daniel. Kim calls him a jerk. They make up briefly until Daniel jokingly calls Kim a sex-crazed drug addict.

Mom Weir has set the dining-room table with lots of candles and has prepared a special meal of Cornish game hens with plum wine sauce. Dad Weir isn't familiar with Cornish game hens and he wants to know if she put poison in the birdfeeder. Lindsay tentatively tries it and Mom encourages her to keep eating. Dad, on the other hand, picks up his bird (The hen! The hen! That's what I'm referring to, you sick people!) and uses a high voice to speak as the hen. Basically, he acts like a jerk and waggles it around (the hen!) while Mom gives him the stank-eye. Dad decides to make a sandwich instead, and he gets up and goes to the kitchen. Mom commands him to help clear the table if he isn't going to eat the dinner she has prepared. Dad shouts that it isn't his job to do that -- it is her job because she doesn't run the store for twelve hours a day.

In the locker room, Bill is in the process of removing his shirt. Biff tells the class not to get changed because he's been receiving prank calls and he intends to get to the bottom of it. What, is this his only class? Geez, I already thought that "teaching" gym was a pretty sweet gig, but if you only have one class it isn't even work. Anyway, he tells them that he's going to see everyone in his office, one at a time. Neal says to Bill, "Smooth move, Alexander Graham Bell."