Sam is so bored, he's practically catatonic. Some random jock we've never seen before (as far as I can recall) observes, "Hey, not all our cheerleaders are pretty." Todd snorts, "You can say that again." Cindy tells him to shut up, and Todd tells Cindy he wasn't talking about her: "How about you get over yourself?" Were people using that expression in 1980? I mean, I wasn't, because I was in grade one, but were teenagers? Sam tries to will himself into invisibility. Cindy, staring at the table, murmurs, "Sam, you're not going to defend me?" Sam hisses that Todd wasn't talking about her. "So you're just going to let it go?" Cindy prods. Todd -- who is wearing A LOT of blusher and eyeliner -- barks at Cindy, "Would you stop? I like Sam. What -- do you want to see us fight?" Random Jock drawls, "I'd like to see that." Sam glances around shiftily. Cindy poutily eats her pudding. You know, I never really shared Cate's intense animosity toward Cindy before; I always found Cindy to be boring but essentially benign. But clearly Cate is a far better judge of character than I. Cindy sucks.
Bill and Neal play Mousetrap -- a game my aforementioned cousin Chris had that I always coveted, and which he always claimed was too boring to play with me. Bill wins, and gloats a little, and Neal dryly says, "Maybe you can get the school to start a team!" Suddenly we see that Sam is also present, and apparently very sad. Bill kindly reassures him, "Sam, don't worry, it's just a game. I mean, I'm good at Mousetrap, and you're really good at Kerplunk." Sam tells him that he's not upset about the game: "It's just this thing with Cindy." Neal and Bill look quizzical, and Sam blurts, "She's kinda...she's kinda boring!...It's weird hanging out with her friends. I mean, all she ever wants to do is make out and stuff." Neal mutters, "I'd kill to be that bored!" Bill posits, "Maybe you're not doing this right. I mean, aren't you supposed to go out on dates and stuff?" Sam says that they went to the mall twice, and to a football game once, and then to a different mall. Neal says, "That sounds fantastic!" Bill suggests, again, that Sam take Cindy on a date, and that he plan to do something that he (Sam) enjoys. Sam sighs, "But what if she doesn't want to do what I want to do?" Bill wisely asks, "Then why are you going out with her?" Before Sam can answer, Neal spits, "Because she's a goddess! Am I the last sane man on this godforsaken planet? Hey, pass her over here! [Nice, Neal.] I'd move to the mall if she wanted me to." Sam exhaustedly says that he'll ask Cindy on the date Bill suggests, and, for good measure, tells them both to shut up.