Subject: Still I Rise

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Derek and Jason roll up in front of Wexler's office building. Derek reminds Jason that they are going to "confront Wexler with the truth." Jason asks what that is, and Derek admits that he doesn't know, but "Chloe's in the hospital, Lan's on a date with Snoop Dogg, and we're sitting here in a bucket with our thumbs up our butt." They share a butt? Just then, a body comes crashing down and hits the sidewalk next to them. A shoe hits the windshield. Yep, it's Wexler. Derek looks up at the building and sees a broken window with XT (maybe?) peering out, but Jason misses it. J-Dawg and I debate the splatter principle of the falling body, and whether it would have made a bigger mess.

Derek and Jason show up at Chloe's hospital room to tell her that they saw XT's corpse. Chloe, who is stuffing her face with hospital food, says that it wasn't XT. Derek doesn't have time for Chloe's explanations, because he needs to call Lan and warn her. He starts to use his cell phone, but a hospital employee tells him that he can't use the phone in the hospital, and he has to find a pay phone.

Lan and Boomer are poolside. Boomer asks what's up with Lan and Derek. Lan says that Derek is just being protective. Boomer thinks Lan wishes it were more, and Lan says she's not sure. Boomer offers to help confuse things, and they start kissing. That Boomer is cute. Lan's phone rings, as Derek calls and fills her in on Chloe's injuries. Just then XT appears and starts to choke Derek, saying, "You were warned!" Lan just keeps going, "Derek, are you there?" And then Derek dies. The End.

Again, just kidding. Just pointing out how silly those false cliffhangers are before every commercial break. Derek is lying on the floor of the warehouse that housed the video shoot. His phone rings, and Jason wonders where Derek has been. Before Derek can fill him in, XT grabs him and tells him that he and his friends will be killed if they don't stay away. Derek tells him that he looks "really cheesy for a dead guy." XT just keeps repeating that Derek should stay away. Derek, unafraid, tells XT that he's not dead. XT pauses and then frustratedly tears off his sunglasses. Derek bemoans the fact that Jason was right. Joy walks out and says that she and Staselina both warned him. Derek says something about getting hit by a bus and XT says that was just supposed to be a warning. Derek begs for "just one walking corpse story." Staselina walks out and says that it wasn't a walking corpse that killed her brother (Wexler, for those of you without a score card) -- "it was something much worse."

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