Subject: The Harbingers

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | Grade It Now!
The Return

Welcome back, everyone! The show opens with Derek standing in a house. His house? Maybe. There's salsa music playing, and there's a party going on. Everything is in slow motion. Ah, it's obviously a dream. Unless you're Buffy, please don't try the prophetic dream thing. Please. Derek looks confused as he watches people dancing. He spies Jason sitting at a nearby table, and calls to him, but Jason doesn't respond. When he looks back, Jason is gone. Derek looks into the house and sees a beautiful Lan, who smiles back at him. On a side note, I think that Ethan Embry, dressed in his evil twin costume, was standing behind her. Lan approaches Derek, who says, "I didn't know we were having a party!" Before he can finish the sentence, Lan lays a big smooch on him. A big one! She replies, "Now you know." After Lan leaves, Chloe comes over and hugs Derek, saying, "Guess who's here? Go say hello to your brother."

Derek walks up to Adam, and they warily circle one another before hugging. That was him I saw before! I'm an eagle eye. Adam asks why Derek doesn't pick up the phone anymore (remember the whole "we never let the phone ring -- we're magic twins and know when they other is calling" thing?). Derek says, "Because you're dead." Adam's all, "Oh yeah," and then says he likes what Derek's done with the website, except for "the big eye." In case you don't get it, some guys walk by behind him, carrying a laptop with the show logo on the screen. Oh my God! Was that actually -- subtle? Derek says he's trying to "figure out why [Adam] killed [himself]." Adam replies, "Everybody needs a hobby, right?" At first, I thought he meant that killing himself was his hobby. I'm not too swift sometimes. Adam asks if Derek has "seen [his] book." Derek looks down to see that he is holding a book called The Harbingers by Wilson Ashcroft. Adam's all, "Make sure you read it!" Derek thinks the book sucks. Suddenly, the author (pictured on the dust cover) is there, but he's in black and white. In case you hadn't figured out yet that this is a dream. He starts describing the book (and thus, tonight's plot) as "a spine-tingling tale" about "an evil that preys on unwitting citizens." Derek still thinks the book sucks. Adam apologizes, saying Derek's "not a reader." Ashcroft thinks Derek is "a lamb to the slaughter," and "hasn't got what it takes to finish the job." God, is it time for the credits yet? Turns out that Derek is going to Cassadaga tomorrow, and Adam reveals that Ashcroft, "the greatest writer that ever lived," lives there. Derek says, "Adam, the guy only wrote one book!" Adam replies, "So did God." Ooh, burn from your dead brother! The worst kind.

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