Mud Bowl redux! Except not, because ain't nothing ever going to be like Mud Bowl was. But Coach doesn't care, because there's nothing he loves better than watching his boys play football in the rain. This is the Panthers' last game before State, and it's a slippery mess of a Texas toad strangler (see? I learned!), but Coach tells them to have fun out there, and they do. J.D.'s father has told him to keep the ball on the ground because of the rain, but J.D. keeps putting the ball in the air. He makes a bunch of risky plays, Joe is in the stands freaking out per usual, but it works out in the end. It is probably just dumb luck that it works out, but it does. On the way to get something to eat after the game, J.D. is chatty and happy because he's fifteen and doesn't see what the big deal is whether it was luck or skill. But as the family walks through the parking lot in the pouring rain, Joe tries to "have a talk" with his son. When J.D. finally wakes up and resists his father, Joe completely loses it and starts wailing on the kid. Luckily (!) Coach and Tami are inside the restaurant; they see what's happening and rush out to help, their leotards and capes merely implied. Katie and J.D. go to the Taylors' that night. Joe McCoy last seen walking glumly out of the Applebee's parking lot in a downpour.
Mindy's crossed into the "My Special Princess Day" zone of wedding planning, and instructs Tyra that she WILL throw a tea party for her bridal shower. In December. Tyra is overwhelmed by planning the party, so luckily Renaissance Man Landry is there to help her schlep tables and chairs and slice cucumbers ("a little thinner" he suggests). Despite the sudden thunderstorm of Forces of Nature (oh yeah, I just went there) proportions, and despite (or because?) the fact that the stripper attendees are named Kandy and Fashionette and such, the shower goes off without a hitch.
A high school redistricting plan has been brought up for a vote by the town. The state will funnel some money into Dillon if they split the schools into Dillon High and East Dillon High. Of course, redistricting means splitting the football team up, so the Boosters go into action with military precision, figuring out who lives where (and we're not just talking about the kids already in high school, but the kids they're scouting in elementary school even) and gerrymandering the district to keep the Panthers in tact. Coach doesn't like the sound of this plan; Buddy tells him that if he doesn't like to see how the sausage gets made, he'd best stay out of the kitchen.
Lyla's drinking a lot and playing Playstation over at The Playgirl Ranch. She wallows a while, and Tim Riggins continues to walk around being all Dream Package Hot Boyfriend/Best Friend/Committed Partner -- not only cracking awesome jokes (he calls Lyla "Beer Wolf") but trying his darnedest to get her to feel better (he takes her to church!) and then also just speaking some true wise words ("You're the best, your life will work out") and then he tells her that he's madly in love with her. It's ridiculous, but I love it. I don't see narratively straight when it comes to Timmy Riggins.
Another week, another insanely good episode, another SEASON RENEWAL YAY!!!
The Collette women and Billy are roaming around what looks like a Sears or J.C. Penney, registering for Mindy's and Billy's wedding. Mindy spies a sangria set, wants it, makes Tyra scan it. Billy says he's heading over to Automotive to see if he can register for a leaf blower; Tyra thinks that sounds like a great idea and tries to hand the scanner off to him, but Billy evades the scanner like he's a secret Communist. Tyra's mom wants to know why Tyra is so testy, it seems like Angela's the only one excited for Mindy's wedding. Tyra confesses she's worried about her S.A.T scores. Angela sort of uselessly tries to assure her daughter that everything will be okay since she's been working so hard. Mindy calls them back to the task at hand, and then demands Tyra tell her what the bridal shower plans are. Tyra's called all her girlfriends and Seven Senoritas. Mindy jumps in and says they can't go to Seven Senoritas, they always go there, she wants something special. Tyra cracks that it will be special when her girlfriends buy her new thongs to replace all her old ones. Oh, old thongs. That's ludicrous. (Ba dum dum). Mindy brainstorms, by basically looking around her and settling on the first thing her eyes land on -- she wants "a tea" because she is standing right in front of a tea set. Angela thinks that sounds square, Mindy pleads that it's not square, it's "classy." Tyra snarks about her sister not having any class, but Mindy just tells her that her bridal shower is going to be a tea. "Make that happen." Billy comes running back holding a leaf blower and tells the ladies to check him out. The camera pulls back and we see Billy holding the leaf blower engine down by his hips, the four foot tube extending and pointing up right on up into Mindy's tea party.
Football field. Madison hangs out by the fence watching J.D. hit receiver after receiver. Coach gives the boys five, and J.D. runs over to talk to Madison. She juts her chin out and tells him that he looks pretty hot out there. J.D., goofball, confirms that, "yeah, it is pretty warm out there." Coach notices what's happening and sends Wade over to get Romeo back over to practice. Wade apologizes to the "little lady" and drags J.D. away. Coach catches J.D.'s eye and tells him: "On your own time. This is my time." J.D. apologizes and that's how a normal man deals with a boy who's getting a little too hot under the waistband.