Back in the Depressingly Realistic Rehab Facility, Francine the Depressingly Realistic Deep-Voiced Nurse has apparently just told Jason that he can't have sex. He's not happy. She clarifies, "It's not medically safe to ejaculate," and explains that the risk is that semen could backflow into his bladder and cause a urinary tract infection. So, it takes a spinal injury to even the UTI playing field between men and women? Jason tells the nurse that he likes her but she "sure knows how to break a guy's heart." Aw. I didn't realize that's where the heart resided on the male anatomy.

After school, Coach and Tami walk out to their car. Tami is wearing an adorable sundress and cowboy boots. She asks her husband what's going to happen with Reyes. Taylor jerks, "He just gets a little hot under the collar." Tami is like, wha? "He put him in a hospital bed, bad!" Coach turns to her -- the late afternoon light in this scene is perfect -- and asks if he's talking to his wife or the guidance counselor. Ouch. They launch into their cute talk-over-one-another fighting style, but when Julie walks up they knock it off and all three get into the car. Coach tells his daughter he got her something, "An apple" and Julie responds, "Gee, whiz." Heh. Coach continues, "Apple of your daddy's eye" and the Taylors are one day going to send me straight into diabetic shock.

Tyra walks up to Tim's house to the tune of music that is neither metal nor rap-rock, which is what I would peg Tim as normally listening to. She knocks, Tim opens the door and walks away, leaving it open. Tyra: "Thanks." She busts in and announces that Bart Oliver asked her out. "He's a defensive end." Tim responds, "Yeah, I know who he is." Tyra tells him she just doesn't want anyone else ending up in the hospital like that Kaster kid. Tim tells her not to flatter herself. Tyra responds, "You know, I'm trying to be the mature one here." Pause. "Douche bag." Heh. Awesome. Tim: "That's classy" and then Tyra rolls her eyes dramatically and walks out the door. Now, see, these two? Chemistry together. Taylor Kitsch and Minka Kelly? Stabby eyeballs.

The phone rings, and Tim picks it up. It's Jason calling, "I need you to come down here, Timmy." Tim looks a bit panicked but agrees. Jason holds the phone between his palms, his fingers still all knotted up, and then tosses it to the ground once Tim agrees.

Commercials. Huge SUV drives down the highway. Inside, Buddy drives and tells Coach he's glad he called him in to help. They're going to get Reyes released from jail. How long has he been there? What day is this? It has to be at least the day after he got picked up from practice. Buddy continues, telling Coach that they might have to talk to the Sports Judge again. Taylor is surprised and upset. Apparently, Buddy tells him, when interviewing Voodoo's family, someone mentioned "the academic council" they had with him, a.k.a. the back room motel deal they cut with Voodoo. Coach can't believe that Buddy refers to that slimy exchange as an "academic council." Buddy continues, telling Coach that the rules state that a player must be in residence for thirty days before putting on a uniform, so "the council took place in July." Coach exclaims, "it took place two weeks ago!" and then asks Buddy not to ask him to lie. Buddy tells him to calm down; every school in the region did the same thing they did, and then he switches the focus back to Reyes, "one crisis at a time."