Somebody with long, blonde hair walks down an out-of-focus hallway, and because we're just coming back from commercial, the image resolves into Tyra. She's all dressed up, with her hair down and jewelry and makeup and a kicky tan dress. She knocks on a hotel-room door, and Connor looks surprised to see her. "I thought I was picking you up," he says. Yes, but with the change in Connor's travel plans, she obviously had to move up her timetable. She asks to come in, and almost immediately clamps her face onto his as a little Ted Nugent guitar starts up. Something tells me they're not going to dinner after all. I hope he had a big lunch.

The song continues into the next scene, which is at the football stadium. Amid shots of the cheerleaders, lights, crowds, players, and more extras than a DeMille picture, the announcer sets the scene for us: "Voodoo madness has cast its spell on the Lone Star State. 16,000 people have gathered together to witness the debut of superstar phenom Ray 'Voodoo' Tatum." Can you really be a "superstar phenom" before your debut, though? ["I'd say he's already premiered some impressive ability in the horse's-ass department." -- Sars] "I can't remember when there was so much riding on a game this early in the season," the announcer adds, although he doesn't explain why that is. Looks like even though it's an away game, every member of the cast save Tyra and Jason is in the stadium, including Tami, Julie, and of course Buddy Garrity. We forgo the traditional kickoff shot in favor of launching right into a game montage in which our guys do a lot of colliding in midair with the home team, the maroon-clad Tigers. During one play, Riggins is flattened and Voodoo is sacked, prompting him to storm back to the bench and furiously knock over the giant Gatorade coolers. The other Panthers look on in alarm, as the announcer understates that Taylor's game plan "is not going the way he hoped." Taylor chomps his gum angrily.