Friday Night Lights
In the Bag

Episode Report Card
Joe R: A | 6 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Don't You Forget About Glenn
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously on Friday Night Lights: Becky's dad was a shiftless jerk and likely responsible for her being as needy and annoying as she is today; Jess slapped Landry for kissing her while still being hung up on Tyra; the Lions found an offensive spark by giving Vince the ball; and Matt Saracen left town.

Now, Tami is staking out Julie's bedroom in the early morning hours, checking to see if she's still crying her little eyes out. Matt hasn't called her yet, it sounds like. Coach wanders by and says he'll call, then offers to make Tami coffee. Tami's totally busted when Julie finally does emerge from her room. She's not crying, just dazed and surly and sleepy. She's either all cried out or she has not yet begun to cry.

At the Cafferty ranch, Luke and his parents try to rustle their giant herd of cattle into a pen. Ma and Pa Cafferty talk to their son about the "cow rustlers" who have been poaching their cattle as of late. "What kind of idiot would want to steal cows?" complains Luke, clearly annoyed at having to be up, in the mud, doing cow work. "This sucks," he follows. "Don't say sucks," Ma admonishes. "Have a vocabulary." This is how you get raised to apologize to Tami Taylor for lying to her face just then. Though I feel for Luke, having his semi-vulgar impulses stifled like this. Anyway, Pa tells Luke to plan on missing school this week to help get their fence fixed. Luke protests that if he doesn't go to school they won't let him practice. But Pa can't afford to hire anybody. God, the number of different ways this show finds to define the American experience as being well and truly fucked is astounding. Poor Luke.

Tami turns the corner into the West Dillon office to hushed murmuring. What's the deal? Well as Glenn -- Glenn! -- tells her, West Dillon has won a blue ribbon award for academic excellence! Actually, as Glenn tells it, it was Tami who won the award for the school. I swear to you people, as I was making my notes on my first viewing, I jotted down "Now who is this brown-noser trying to be Tami's new Glenn?" But it IS Glenn! It's been a while since we've all derisively spit out your name, Glenn. Anyway, Tami is just pleased as punch, and she does that thing where her voice goes up to soprano when she is just so pleased, y'all!.

Ugh. Becky. So her deadbeat dad rolls up in a big rig with no payload on the back, which means it's now just 18 wheels full of metaphors. Becky's jumping out of her skin to see her daddy, of course, because girls like her will never stop romanticizing dads like him. She runs out and hugs him, and he's got a teddy bear for her (of course) and is amazed at how grown up she's gotten, so Lord knows the last time he's even seen her. Cheryl comes out of the house all business, telling her ex that she's rented out the Airstream so he'll have to sleep in the guest room, then sweeps Becky off to drive her to school. Becky makes snotty "isn't she the worst?" faces to Deadbeat but still goes off with her mom. As they drive off, Tim emerges from his gleaming silver tube of sex and sloth. Deadbeat is immediately and obviously threatened, as anyone rightly would be. Tim introduces himself but Deadbeat doesn't, meaning that nickname's gonna stick all episode.

East Dillon. Coach calls the teams in for a little pep talk, though I'm momentarily distracted by the kid wearing glasses. How exactly does THAT work? Do they even fit under your helmet? Anyway. Coach is singing a slightly different tune this week, as there's no more "A"s for effort. They're gonna win this week! And he says they're going to switch things up too, tossing a red jersey at Vince. Now, since it is my understanding that nobody who watches Friday Night Lights actually watches football, I should mention that the red (or yellow, or whatever color) jersey is worn by the quarterback in order to distinguish him from everybody else, so he won't get hit in practice. Coach tells the team they have all of 30 second to get their licks in on Vince before he officially becomes the new QB. And there is much boyish roughhousing! Watch out, kid with glasses!

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Friday Night Lights

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