Dillon High. Matt runs into Julie in the cafeteria and they stand around awkwardly. Julie finally breaks the ice and tells Matt that this is the most awkward conversation in the history of the world. Matt manages to lob a clever reply in response to her volley, telling her it's nowhere near as awkward as when Grandma tried to explain to him where babies come from. Julie giggles and asks what he did, and Matt dials down the cleverness back to his normal levels and mutters about how he just turned the TV on and pretended not to hear the minute he heard the word "stork." They pause and then Julie moves on, saying her friends are waiting for her. Meanwhile, Landry has overheard their whole conversation, so as Matt turns and watches Julie walk away, he shakes his head and simply says, "No." Matt pretends like he doesn't know what Landry is talking about, and Landry keeps repeating "No. No. No," as Matt walks off.
Football practice. Eric and Mac are getting sick to their stomachs watching how lame the team is. So Eric rounds the kids up and tells him that they're going to switch everything up, offense will play defense, defense offense. "Let's have some fun." In a sex-themed episode, this top/bottom switch is begging for me to get vulgar. So they switch and it turns out that sometimes the givers like to be the receivers and vice versa! Coach smiles as he watches the boys have so much fun mounting one another in new ways, until one particular boy catches his eye. Is this Caligula or something? He asks Mac who the lanky-looking kid -- #43 -- is. Mac tells him it's "Saracen's friend," and Coach replies, "You mean Lance?" Mac corrects him: "Landry. Landry Clark, I think."
Meanwhile, it seems that Matt Saracen might be more of a committed top than we originally thought because he's really prickly on the field. He tells Smash that he needs to get down on the line and Smash says he doesn't "get down on all fours for nobody." That's not what Matt heard, he says and they start to tussle. Seriously, when did I change the channel to Pay-Per-View? Eric breaks it up and tells the two of them to give him "fifty up/downs." When Smash protests, Eric makes it a hundred. The rest of the team looks dejected that their star players can't just have a little fun switch-hitting every once in a while.