Tyra pours a big old glass of water on Tim, because obviously she gets that Tim Riggins ought to be soaking wet all of the time. He moans and looks intensely hot for awhile, and she tortures him for fun, and her mom -- I missed her! -- offers him breakfast, because that's what you do to a Panther on your couch. Even if he's not on the team, he's still shirtless. Tyra rescinds the offer and tells him again that he absolutely has to get out. I'm sure if we saw the kitchen clock it would read 7:01, because that's how Tyra rolls. He looks up at her, and there's none of that practiced stupidity in his eyes, he's completely, sadly, seriously lost: "I've got nowhere to go, Tyra." She points out that this is only because he's throwing a hissy about Billy and Jackie, which she additionally points out is stupid and the Jackie thing was inappropriate in the first place. Which: Jackie is about the hottest person outside the regular cast, and I love how she shows up on every single show being hot and loveable. She's like if Anne Dudek had a heart and was eerily identical to Jessica Biel. (Fun fact! Anne Dudek has the same birthday as both Sars and myself! Astrology is terrifyingly real!) Mindy -- whom I think we can call agree is a stellar character reference in any situation -- brings up a totally sketchy-sounding "guy" who needs help with his "pets," and before you can say "Michael Vick," Tim is like, "That sounds absolutely dreadful, but I am out of options."
Eric brings a copy of the Chronicle to Tami with the most uproariously hurt expression on his face, like he just found the Sophomore Burn Book and he was listed as Third Hottest Coach or Most Bookish. He's like, "Where does the goddamn money go?" Tami laughs and just waves at him: "I know! She's totally a journalist! Hey, on that note: have you noticed the new teacher and how she's dating him?" Eric's like, "Quote! 'Athletic director and Panther football coach had no comment'! She's asked me through the bathroom door! What am I supposed to do! I was busy!" Hee! I still think of him as this young hot dude, which he is, but: Who knew he was going to be the realest dad of all time? Tami laughs and notes that Julie's doing a good job, and has a point or two. He just grumbles and shuffles out of the room again. She's like, "Bye, honey!"
Back in the athletic offices, Mama Williams is waiting for Eric and looking totally bereft. He welcomes her in, because they have always had a serious respect for each other, and she sits. "What are you doing about this recruitment insanity?" She tells him about the constant phone calls, and Smash "acting like he needs a Hollywood agent." Have you met Smash? He was born that way. She reminds Eric that he told the parents he was keeping an eye on it. Eric is like, "It's like this every year. But especially with your son, and I get it, because he is amazing and talented." She's like, "You know how Smash won't quit about going pro and doesn't believe in college?" Which is a very funny way to take on Eric, and he kind of doesn't get what she's saying at the same time as he does, because his whole life at this desk is verbally mincing around landmines, every second. "I can give recommendations. I can give advice. But in the long run, that's a decision that you and Brian will make," basically, is his answer. I think he agrees with me that Brian is right about going pro, but I don't know as much as he does as far as dividing one's eggs between baskets, so I don't know how much of this is careful wording, and how much is staying far away from the parent/teacher meridian. She levels, beautifully: "My dead husband was a trifling man. I couldn't count on him to bring his paycheck home, or to be faithful, but he was always there for Brian. They could talk." She takes a measured pause and says it the most concise way you possibly could: "I'm not asking you to be this boy's daddy. I'm just here to remind you he doesn't have one." Eric nods, because: there it is. I would still be talking an hour later, but there it is. Mama Williams, I wish you were my mom. She gets it done right.