Tami is getting flak from all sides for her decision to reallocate the funds the Football Boosters raised for a Jumbotron. She gullibly gives an interview to a newspaper, which then runs a Brangelina-style piece about how the Taylor's marriage is on the rocks, and nobody in town will talk to her. Buddy and the Lady Mayor are stopping just short of putting a horse's head in her bed, with the threats and the backdoor meetings with the superintendent and such. It also doesn't help that Tyra is repaying Tami for all her faith and hard work by running for Student Council President on the "I'll get you laid" platform. Which, BTW, totally works.
Lyla and Tim are still peas in a pod... under the sheets, that is. But things get a little John Hughes-y when Lyla buys her wrong-side-of-the-tracks boyfriend a blazer and brings him as her date to a fancy lunch with her father and the McCoys. Buddy is cruel and vicious, and Tim eats some raw pigeon. But Tim looks like he might have the best revenge; because when Lyla comes by his house later to apologize, she looks pretty damn at home surrounded by the underpants-wearing, beer-drinking Tim, a shirtless Billy, and stripper Mindy.
Coach finally gets through to the hesitant Smash by bringing the team together for some impromptu Saturday Night Lights. Smash gets his fire back, and not long after, Texas A&M calls Coach asking for it.
Grandma Saracen is, in the words of a kindly lawyer, "losing it." She's refusing to take her blood pressure medicine and insisting that Cagney & Lacey was a good show. Matt has two options: get himself legally emancipated to become her guardian, or ship her off to a home. He kicks some boxes in frustration at his implacable situation, and then mans up (like he always does). Since his dad is in Iraq, he drives all night to his mom's. I know! His mom! Who is Joanie from Deadwood! And also, who cuts beautiful flowering branches and puts them in water in her artfully disheveled bohemian home. And plays the guitar! Oh, Joanie! I am very excited for you. On his way back into town, he passes by Applebees, and decides to stop to see if Julie needs a ride home. Much side-glancing and giggling later, and I'm thinking some blankets might be shared soon enough.
"Get it off! Get it off!" We open on Lyla and Tim, in his bed under the covers, Lyla begging Tim to get his pants off. He chuckles about it being a new buckle and our hopes are dashed when Billy busts in the room demanding to know what's going on. Not with the teen sex, of course, but with the letter he found from Oklahoma State expressing interest in Tim. Lyla jumps up, excited, wondering why Tim hasn't told her about this yet. Tim just sort of curls his lip and doesn't say anything. Lyla jumps out of bed and runs to get her laptop to write a response to the college. Billy points his finger at his brother: "You and me, pal. We're goin' places."
Tami is giving an interview to a local reporter, talking about the reallocation of funds from the Jumbotron to textbooks. The reporter digs for information about whether there's tension in the Taylor household over Tami taking money away from the football program. Tami says that she thinks that she and her husband both approach their careers and their marriage with respect. I'm sure that'll make headlines: "Coach and Wife Respect Each Other."
Grandma Saracen's blood pressure is 160 over 100. The doctor tells her that she's in dangerous territory and she giggles that she doesn't take her medications because they dry out her skin, and then non-sequiturs to Matt, "Matthew did we turn off the stove?" The doctor pulls Matt outside and tells him this is a big problem. Matt asks if the doctor can give him the pills and he'll make sure she takes them. The doctor said that he can't legally do that, and then proceeds to tell Matt that Grandma is no longer able to handle her own affairs, that they knew this day was coming.
Tami sits in the dark with a glass of wine and her laptop. Coach wanders out and she tells him that she's waiting for the early edition of the paper to come out with her article in it. Coach tells her that she shouldn't read her own press; Tami tells him to shut it. She refreshes, and gasps, first in excitement, but then in horror. The headline is "New Principal Vows to Shake up Establishment: Tensions Run High in Marriage..." complete with two hilarious pictures of Coach and Tami, each with take-no-shit faces on. Tami quickly slams the computer shut and Coach says he'll get more wine.
Credits. Smash runs cones out on the field. Apparently not very well. Coach notices that every time he goes left he loses speed. Smash promises him that it's not his knee, he's not in pain. Smash tells Coach he has to get to work, and then asks what the big plan is. Coach tells him not to worry; he'll handle getting interest from colleges, Smash just needs to take care of the rest. Cut to Coach walking into his office on his cell phone. He's selling Smash to someone at Texas Tech, who apparently isn't buying. Coach hangs up and Mac comes in and states the obvious: that it isn't a good time to set up a walk-on right now.