Friday Night Lights
Who's Your Daddy

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: A | 3 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Father Never Knows Best

On the field. Saracen has his red shirt on and runs a decent play to begin. Voodoo saunters onto the field late. Coach Taylor walks right up to him and gets in his face, "Practice starts at four o'clock, I want you here at four o'clock." (Okay, so this is afternoon now. Between Lyla/Street/eggs and Julie/dance practice, a school day passed.) Voodoo just shoulders his way past Coach Taylor without acknowledging him. Coach Taylor gets back in his face and repeats himself, and Voodoo once again walks away from him. Tim mutters from inside his helmet, "I hate him. Hate him." Second utterance from Riggs that's a little too flat.

Practice gets underway, a song by one of the guys who used to be in Phaser plays, and Voodoo is like a finely wrought machine, though he does seem to enjoy just running the ball himself rather than passing. Voodoo is Michael Vick to Saracen's Tony Romo. Nasty Sweaty Buddy Garrity rolls across the endzone, clapping his hands when he sees Voodoo run the ball in for a score. Coach Taylor looks on in conflicted disappointment; he apparently doesn't want to see the newcomer do so well. Buddy Garrity rolls his no-neck/all-chin fat head over to Coach and drawls, "Looooked gooood, Coach" and then smarms about how Voodoo is doing something with the chance Taylor gave him. He then does this sort of two-step while sing-songing "Got my voooodooo workin'...got my voooodoooo workin'" and what the FUCK, Fat Head, is this some kind of minstrel show you're trying to put together? The camera jerks around and quick pans in on Coach Taylor's and Saracen's worried faces, as Buddy chuckles like he's mothereffing Boss Hogg.

Commercials. In the radio station, Slammin' Sammy Mead (for God's sake, I feel like I need a "AAOOGA" horn to emit every time I hear that name) patronizingly asks Voodoo how he felt when he was trapped in the Superdome. Voodoo responds that God told him to "war up, dance with fear." Uh, okay. Fat Head Boss Hogg just happens to be sitting next to his prized possession, um, I mean "prized recruit," and interjects that he thought the heavens had opened up when Voodoo "landed in Dillon." While Boss Hogg nastily sweats out this utter bullshit, Voodoo casts his eyes to the side, clearly something brewing for this man who thinks he can buy and sell people like he's Simon Legree or something. Buddy continues, saying he thinks this is Dillon's "starting quarterback," prompting the interviewer to ask if he's a guaranteed start. Buddy Buck Tooth chaws through a smarmy smile to say, "Ahh, no, that's not my department, you'll have to talk to Coach Taylor about that..."

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Friday Night Lights

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