Fringe

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Robots Need Love Too. They Want to Be Loved by You.
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

In Boston, Peter and Fauxlivia are out for dinner and doing that game that allegedly cute couples in television and movies do, which is look at the other people around them and guess stuff about them, like their occupations and relationship status. As usual, instead of coming across funny and intimate, it just makes the couple seem kind of obnoxious. Although I have to admit that Peter pegging one guy as "Persian Kid Rock" was pretty funny. Fauxlivia is certain Persian Kid Rock is a banker: "His long hair is just his link to his individuality," she says, adding that she thinks they work together, and Peter runs with it and ... Jesus, why am I recapping this? I'd just like to point out that anyone else in the restaurant playing this game and looking at Fauxlivia and Peter might assume they're a couple of obnoxious yuppies who can't bear to look at each other for more than five seconds straight.

Anyway, it eventually leads to Peter saying things that he doesn't realize say more about him and, say, Walter ("We all draw our moral lines in the sand. And unless you can put yourself in another man's shoes, I don't think you can really judge their situations") as well as things that he knows are about himself and Fauxlivia: "You can always tell when a relationship's about to take that next step."

Then he says he had a really nice time (as did Olivia) but despite a moment ago sounding like he expected to get laid tonight, he has to head home lest Walter starts calling the emergency rooms. They get up to go, but Fauxlivia asks for a moment and she goes to the washroom and looks really conflicted, and then steels herself. Psst! It's behind the toilet tank! Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.

Over in Brookline, good ol' Senator Van Horn is pulling up in his big black car next to a lemonade stand run by a couple of young girls who are literally all "Senator Van Horn!" like they could not be more excited for Justin Bieber. But really, is there anything more fun than overpaying for lemonade from adorable eager-beaver neighbourhood kids? Van Horn "forgets" his change, and he's too busy chuckling and looking in his rearview mirror (the girls seem genuinely distressed that he forgot his change) to see that he's about to be broadsided by a truck. I hope the girls aren't too freaked out, because all the police and ambulance folks who are going to show up will need refreshment too. Every cloud, kids. Every cloud.

Over at a hospital, Van Horn is wheeled through the hallway with a nurse wanting to fire up the defibrillator because he doesn't have a pulse, but the doctor points out he's still breathing.

Later, Broyles glower-walks through the hospital and comes up to Van Horn's wife, Patricia, who complains that "they won't tell me anything," and that's all Broyles needs to hear to go into badge-flashing threatening-stare time, and the duty nurse meekly acquiesces to Broyles' "request" for information, looking like she's worried she might get shot if she doesn't (which, admittedly, does look like a possibility).

Meanwhile, Newton of all people is striding through the hall to the emergency OR, where the doctor's confused because they're not getting any blood-pressure reading from the guy either. He's never going to find out, because Newton strolls in and tells him to step aside. When the doctor doesn't, Newton shoots him.

Hearing the shot (and a few more), Broyles gets his own gun and starts heading towards the sound of gunfire. Newton's rolling Van Horn's body out of the OR, effortlessly taking down security guards as he goes. Of course, when he's trying to hit any actor whose name is in the opening credits, Newton is a much worse shot, and he misses Broyles, who returns fire and manages to tag Newton, who grabs a hostage as a shield.

"I will kill her!" he warns, and Broyles orders him to drop his weapon. Instead, Newton shoots Van Horn in the face (Broyles is all "nooooo!" and I crabbily observe that each and every "noooo!" should be in slow-motion) then turns to go, shooting a cop and then jumping down a stairwell (that easy several-storey fall jump that we've seen shapeshifters do).

Broyles walks up to Van Horn and stares at him in horror. Oozing from the senator's non-human ripped-out eye socket is mercury "blood."

After the opening credits, we're at Massive Dynamic, and Peter is doing what he does best: undermining his dad. He can't believe Nina's OK with Walter taking over the company, and Nina says it was Bell's last wish, so it doesn't really matter what she thinks about it. "With a basement lab in Harvard, Walter was able to open a wormhole into another dimension that essentially shredded all the laws of science. I can't wait to see what he's capable of doing with a multibillion-dollar corporation," says Peter, and while Nina admits that Walter has made some "regrettable choices" in the past, his "brilliance is undeniable."

And then we go to Walter acting like your crazy drunk philosophy major uncle, babbling on in front of a room of completely terrified scientists about brain and consciousness, doing his hallucinogen-addled genius thing that we've seen a hundred times. It doesn't help that he refers to a scientist's black hair as red and yells that they're all "so limited," and then he starts to take off his clothes because it's getting hot in herre.

Which is when Peter and Nina come in, and Peter is able to keep his father from disrobing, telling him they've got a case, and Nina has to concede that Walter is "a bit unorthodox." "He's also trippin' his brains out right now," points out Peter, like who invited the narc, and Nina just makes a noise.

The Fringe team has assembled at the hospital, with Broyles doing the play-by-play of the hospital security video of Newton shooting his way out. Fauxlivia's all, "Look at that. It's like he's got no fear," like way to play it cool, AGENT FROM ANOTHER UNIVERSE, and Broyles has already figured out that Van Horn was an operative of Newton's, and Newton tried to retrieve him but couldn't, so he shut him up.

Walter's too busy playing with Fauxlivia's hair and telling her it looks like "strands of yellow diamonds," and Peter, who wastes no chance to rat on his father ever, tells everyone that Walter "self-medicated" this morning, and Broyles throws out a stink-eye in the vague direction of the Bishop clan: "Because not only was James Van Horn a sitting U.S. senator with top-level clearance, he was a good man," he says, and wants to know how long ago Van Horn was replaced with a shapeshifter and why.

Fauxlivia volunteers to make sure that his office is "locked down" and she don't need no help no how, she can take care of that one on her own so nobody worry, she's on it. Peter tells Broyles that if they can get to a sitting senator, then the whole government could be compromised, so I guess he's Agent in Charge of Saying Obvious Shit today, and Broyles says he's going to call some dude at the CDC and arrange blood tests for everyone on the Hill, and I'd REALLY like to know what the explanation for that one is going to be, and then Broyles tells Walter to examine the body and see what he can find, and Walter is all, "I think I'll go examine the body and see what I can find," so either he's still high or Broyles is now a Jedi.

And that's just what he's doing, with an FBI agent who looks on with confused interest, especially when Walter asks if she knows where he can purchase some candy buttons, and the FBI agent, all judgy, says, "I wouldn't know. I try not to eat sugar," like A SIMPLE NO WOULD HAVE SUFFICED. Agent My Body is a Temple is confused as to whether Van Horn is a machine or a man. "It is neither. And both. Part machine, part organic. A shape-shifter. Such an inspired creation. Frankly, I'm a little envious that Belly thought of it before I did," says Walter. Man, isn't this highly classified shit? Isn't she just some regular agent? Anyway, Peter comes in with some Red Vines for his dad, at least whatever's left after Peter's already scarfed down half the pack, and Walter sa

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Fringe

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