Just then! Prince Joffrey enters. He tells Sansa he's behaved monstrously and offers her an apology necklace. She's completely charmed by this, because it's slightly shiny and that's all it takes. He asks forgiveness for his rudeness, and she says there's nothing to forgive. Joffrey promises he'll never disrespect her or be cruel to her again. The backlighting here is straight out of the last shot of The Princess Bride, which is how Sansa is currently imagining herself.

Theon Greyjoy is out riding on a random trail when he sees Ros on the back of a cart. She's going to King's Landing because she's heard that Jaime and Ned are fighting. I understand how that could mean that Winterfell would be a bad place to be, but won't King's Landing also be a war zone? Theon wants her to stay, but it's not like he's going to turn her into Lady Greyjoy or anything crazy like that. The cart continues down the road and Theon is sad. He tosses her a coin for one last flash of her crotch. HBO!

Ned tells his girls he's sending them home to Winterfell. See, he understands that King's Landing is about to be a dangerous place. But he thinks Winterfell will be safe? I disagree with both him and Ros; I think the safest place to be is someplace without one of those giant castles. They just attract armies. Sansa wails about leaving Joffrey, her one true love and Arya asks if Ned's leg is going to kill him. Then she asks to bring Syrio back to Winterfell. Sansa thinks that's stupid because she thinks Syrio really is just a dancing instructor. Then she goes back to wailing about Joffrey: "I love him and I'm meant to be with him and have his babies." Ned says he'll find her a better match, someone who's brave and gentle and strong. She walks right into it: "I don't want someone brave and gentle and strong. I want him!" She vows to give him lots of babies with yellow hair. Ned thinks for a bit and tells the girls to go get their things. They leave. Ned opens up that ponderous tome again and studies the Lineages and Histories of the Seven Kingdoms. He turns to the Baratheon page. "Orris Baratheon, black of hair. Axl Baratheon, black of hair." Also black of hair: Lionel, Stefon, and Robert. Then he gets to Joffrey Baratheon, who is golden-haired. There it is.

Dothrak party! Drums! Dancing! Drunken, sword-wearing Viserys! Oh, that seems like a problem. Daenerys tells Jorah to stop him. Viserys refers to the evening as "The whore's feast" and tells Jorah that no one touches the Dragon. That's probably part of his problem. He claims to have been raised to be a king, but he must have been pretty young when he and Dany took it on the lam. Drogo and his men laugh at Viserys. He wants to join the party and does not take kindly to being told that there's a place for him in the darkened back of the tent. Drogo tells him, "You are no king." Viserys pulls out his sword and the mood of the party changes. Jorah tells him to put the sword down before the Dothraki kill all of them. Viserys mocks this, saying, "They can't shed blood in their sacred city. But I can." He puts the tip of the sword on Daenerys's belly, because he has no idea how to behave in civilized company. He insists that he wants the crown he was promised and tells Dany, "He bought you. But he never paid for you." He says that he's going to take Daenerys away, but he's willing to leave the baby. Specifically, he offers to cut the baby out of Dany and leave it on the ground. This is all being translated for Drogo.