And now, Cersei and a naked Lancel Lannister. Lancel? I guess when Jaime's not around, she just goes with what's available. I guess sex with your cousin is less wrong than sex with your twin, but I still can't say I approve. For one thing, he's clearly a dope. He wants to talk about how exciting the war is, but she tells him to shut his pretty mouth and get back into bed. I guess it's good that she's keeping herself occupied.
The Lannisters are also having a war council. It seems like these people have three councils for every actual battle. Tywin is unhappy about Jaime having been taken, which seems pretty reasonable. Tyrion is unable to resist snarking about how Robb is apparently less green than they'd hoped. One of Tywin's advisors thinks they should consider suing for peace with Robb so they can concentrate on whatever it is that Renly and Stannis are doing. Tyrion smashes his cup on the floor so he can make an analogy about how their chance for peace is as broken as that cup. Because Joffrey chopped off Ned Stark's head, so Robb is unlikely to be in a peaceful mood. And besides that, Robb is currently winning.
The advisors start suggesting all sorts of things, like ransoming Jaime or attacking or retreating. Tywin tells everybody to get out, although he makes Tyrion stay. This is another spot where things didn't happen in Standard Television Show Manner. In a regular show, Tywin would just announce, "Leave us!" and everyone would magically know exactly which set of people was supposed to stay behind. In this show, Tyrion started to leave with everyone else. Although when Tywin said, "Not you," I'm not sure how Tyrion knew that meant him. Anyway! Tywin pours Tyrion wine, which makes him suspicious. He tells him he was right about Eddard Stark, who would be much more useful to them alive. With a living Ned Stark, they could trade him to Robb to stall while they dealt with Renly and Stannis. Tywin tells Tyrion, "I always thought you were a stunted fool. Perhaps I was wrong." Tyrion instantly answers, "Half wrong." They both know they're surrounded and can't stay there. So here's the plan: the Mountain is going to set the Riverlands on fire, and everyone else will regroup somewhere. Oh, and Tyrion is being sent to King's Landing. To do what? "Rule! You will serve as Hand of the King in my absence." Well, that should be fun. And Tyrion is supposed to keep an eye on potential treason from Pycelle, Littlefinger, Varys, and that whole crowd. And he's encouraged to put a few heads up on pikes if he finds any traitors. Also, Tywin gives him strict instruction not to bring "that whore" to court. There are plenty of whores already in King's Landing, aren't there? Littlefinger's seen to that.