Game of Thrones
The Climb

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B+ | 7 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Requiem for Ros

This seems fine, so Brienne refills everyone's cup. Well, she tries to, but Roose explains that he's not drinking. But Jaime and Brienne are. Jaime comments, "You'll understand how suspicious that is to ordinary people." And now the twist: Brienne won't be going. Jaime insists, and Bolton tells him he should have learned his lesson about overplaying his... position. See, because it looked like he was going to end his sentence with "hand." That's some Arrested Development-level wordplay. I can't wait for Jaime to start shrieking, "I'M A MONSTER!"

Okay, enough of that. It's time for the big leagues: Tywin Lannister vs. Olenna Tyrell! Tywin is the reigning champion from last season, but Olenna had to get through a series of challengers including Sansa (not much of a fight) and Tyrion. So let's get it on!

Olenna says her grandson (Loras Tyrell, the Knight of the Flowers, who was having sex with Renly Baratheon, and things would be a lot easier on me if you'd remember some of this stuff yourself) is the most desirable bachelor in all seven kingdoms, so she's not thrilled about having to marry him to Cersei. Tywin says Cersei is rich, beautiful and the mother of the King. So she's quite a catch! Olenna says Cersei is old, adding, "I'm something of an expert on the subject." According to Olenna, the change will be on Cersei soon, so it's kind of a waste. Tywin brings up the chance to wash away the stain from the rumors of Loras's "nocturnal activities" and asks if Olenna denies them. A normal person would at least be taken aback, but Olenna has no problem conceding that Loras is "a sword-swallower through and through." Olenna asks if Tywin grew up with boy cousins. He did, so she asks, "And you... never...?" Tywin says he has not, and Olenna presses the issue: "Not once? Not in any way?" "Never," says Tywin. Olenna shrugs, "I congratulate you on your restraint." She thinks a bit of experimentation is perfectly normal. Tywin tries to suggest that Highgarden must have shockingly lax morals, but that turns out to be a blunder. It gives Olenna a chance to go on offense: "True, we don't tie ourselves in knots over a discreet bit of buggery, but... brothers and sisters? Where I come from, that stain would be very difficult to wash out." Tywin says will not discuss that (which I believe is a point to Olenna), and Olenna cheerfully says that it doesn't matter if it's a lie, since plenty of people believe it. Tywin irritably points out that neither of them really care what people believe. So he gets to brass tacks. If Olenna were to support the rumors of Jaime and Cersei, then that would invalidate Joffrey's claim as king, so she'd be wasting a valuable piece by letting Margaery marry him in the first place. Olenna says that if Cersei's too old to bear children, Loras would also be wasted. So let's be clear: she doesn't care about Cersei and Jaime having sex and she doesn't care if Joffrey is the One True King. She just doesn't want to ruin Loras as a bargaining chip. And Tywin doesn't care about Loras being gay; he just wants to use that as a threat.

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Game of Thrones

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