Game of Thrones
The Night Lands

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: A- | 3 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
Thirteen and Pregnant

Matthos tries to get Davos to pray to the One True God. Davos doesn't care about any of that stuff, since he always got home safely without having to pray. Matthos says he always prayed for him. Davos explains, "King Stannis is my god. He raised me up and blessed me with his trust." Davos positively refuses to care about the fire god. Matthos says, "Stannis is my king, but he's only a man."

Back to King's Landing! Cersei is angry with Tyrion, which seems like something that probably happens a lot. This time, she's mad at him for firing Janos Slynt without permission. I'm not sure whether the Hand of the King outranks the Queen Regent. My guess is that he doesn't, since the Queen Regent is acting monarch. Tyrion says that Cersei's policies are losing them the acceptance of the people. She doesn't care about the people, because they're just a bunch of stupid peasants. Tyrion says that when winter comes, half the city will starve and the other half will revolt. She sighs a little, which I take to mean that she's willing to admit that it would be convenient if at least some of the stupid peasants were on their side. Tyrion accuses her of having killed off all those bastards in the last episode, and she doesn't deny it. And then Tyrion realizes that the reason she didn't deny it is that she actually didn't do it. It was Joffrey! And Joffrey may not have told Cersei about the order, because King definitely outranks Queen Regent. She defends her son, saying, "He did what needed to be done." Cersei says that neither Tyrion nor Jaime has ever taken ruling seriously. Not like her, who's very into the idea of ruling people. "It's all fallen on me," she says, giving Tyrion the perfect opportunity to answer, "As has Jaime repeatedly, according to Stannis Baratheon." Cersei is getting a little tired of everyone knowing that she sleeps with her twin, and answers, "You're funny. You've always been funny. But none of your jokes will ever match the first one, will they? Do you remember back when you ripped my mother open on your way open and she bled to death?" Tyrion does not apologize for killing Mama Lannister and just says, "She was my mother too." This does not appease Cersei, who says some more mean things about how there's no bigger joke in the world than Tyrion. I guess this is supposed to establish why she hates him, but I think she's mostly just a jerk. And this has to be a pretty stressful time for her, with her twin-lover held captive, her son turning out to be a rotten king, and the whole kingdom erupting into civil war as soon as she took the place over.

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Game of Thrones

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